update: apparently canberra’s skywhale was harpooned and died
Local resident Michelle Bedford says what she saw can only be described as ‘incredibly unlikely’ and ‘bizarrely beautiful’.
“The guy got on the roof of his van with a crazy look in his eyes I’ve never seen before, as if in his universe there was only him and the Skywhale. He hurled the broomhandle like a harpoon, got it right through the eye.
“We all clapped and cheered, not like we hate the Skywhale or anything but it was just unbelievably cool.”
It then took several hours for security staff and onlookers to disentangle Ahab from the corpse of the Skywhale which had slowly but majestically fallen directly on top of him, like a heavenly blanket with massive breasts.
The sculpture, a hot air balloon depicting a whale as it may have evolved if it lived in the air rather than the sea, has had a mixed reception since it was first launched in 2013. Critics of the Skywhale cited its outlandish appearance, large breast-like appendages and ‘dumb, smug whale face’.
…
Artist Patricia Piccinini, who designed the sculpture, has asked that charges not be pressed against Mr Ahab, claiming that she was “invigorated” to see the public engaging with the artwork on such a meaningful level and that she couldn’t ask for a “more fitting way for a big balloon that looks like a whale to complete its lifecycle in the public eye.”
When asked if the ‘killing’ of the Skywhale had any allegorical significance or if the quest to find and destroy it was in some way symbolic of a larger tale Mr Ahab told reports “Nah mate, just f-ing hate that bloody whale.”
on occasion, i browse the clearance racks at overpriced hipster-y boutiques cause from time to time you can find amazing deals, but being in Rich People Places always makes me a little nervous– and today when i was picking up a layaway from one of these shops, my nerves resulted in a story the shopkeepers are probably gonna be telling for quite a while.
i’d just come from the feed store for lizard food (ie: bugs), and it was like 95F out so they were slowly being smothered to death in my backpack. so when the clerk, who i’d overheard was only on her second day working there, gave me my fancy sundress in a bag way too big for it, i pulled out two dozen crickets in a plastic bag and a tub full of mealworms from my pack and set them gently on the bag so they could breathe better till i got home.
this girl’s eyes go wide and she looks imploringly back at the equally startled-looking manager helping her through the transaction, and i realize that this might look a little weird to folks who aren’t reptile keepers. so, instead of doing the logical thing and explaining that i’m feeding leopard geckos, i sorta chuckled and shrugged apologetically, and just said “dinner, y’know?”
for the briefest of moments, there was an awkward silence so sweaty and suffocating you could drown in it, and then, in true daytime comedy fashion,
I forgot how long Ubisoft credits are. I beat Black Flag a while ago and since then I got caught up on about 3 hours worth of Tumblr, and took a piss and ate and it’s still having credits.
Finally it’s at the fucking production babies which means it’s almost done
I forgot how long Ubisoft credits are. I beat Black Flag a while ago and since then I got caught up on about 3 hours worth of Tumblr, and took a piss and ate and it’s still having credits.
i feel like i can’t go anywhere anymore without people soothsaying my downfall. even the cashier at taco bell was all “the flock of crows taken to following you portent a disastrous and blah blah fucking blah,” i get it, i’m about to undergo a storm of tribulation, what frickin ever
i need people to realize that being open and being outed are two very different things. let me be the one to tell your aunt suzanne i’m queer af, don’t take it upon yourself to introduce me as such.
everyone makes fun of reaper for trying too hard but look at mccree. even if you ignore the fact that he unironically dresses like a cowboy in 2060, the dude literally owns and wears a belt buckle that says ‘BAMF’. i like to think that when Overwatch was still active gabriel reyes once made a passing comment about how pirates were way cooler than cowboys and jesse mccree just fucking lost it and everyone started yelling at him for hurting poor jesse’s feelings and that’s why he hates overwatch
what the fuck. theres not even a fucking joke here. its just the fucking alphabet. i was expecting some kind of fucking meme like “gun” or “john cena” or something like that but no its just the fucking alphabet. here. on tumblr.com. 26 users just fucking banded together to write the alphabet. what the fuck, man.
I think the update broke them, and almost everyone else.
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
50
52
53
54
55
56
57
58
59
60
61
62
63
64
65
66
67
68
69
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
70
71
72 …..why not….making the best out of this sad situation
73… I got so angry at this post I had to reblog it and continue
74
75
76
77
78
79
80
81
82
83
84
85
86
87
88
89
90
91
92
93
94
95
96
97
98
99
100
101
102
103
104
105
106 O.o
107
108
109 - at this point lets just keep going, I wanna see if we can break this system
110
111
112
113
114
115
116
117
118
119
120
121
122
123
124
125
126 bitchessssssssss
127
129
130
131
132
133
134
135
136 that was a wild ride
137
138
139
140
141
142
143
144
145
146
147
148
149
150
151
152
153
154
155 …why are we doing this and how did we get this far
156
157
158
159
160
161
162
163
164
165
166 we will go on for as long as is necessary before tumblr fixes this
