man: has anyone ever told you you’re beautiful?
me: oh no sir, today is my first day out of doors and papà forbade mirrors in the house lest we fall victim to vanity
Me: *kicks down shitty McDonalds door* gimme the fucking McPounder McDonalds Employee:t-that’s forbidden knowledge……………… Me: *kicking over chairs and screaming as the employee runs backstage and calls the mcpolice on my ass*