So I was digging through my parents’ favorite video games and decided to continue my mom’s game in Onimusha 3. It’s kind of old but it’s pretty fun and I’m doing well until I come across this monster.
That is, both in game AND in real life.
Because when I looked down on my arm, there’s this giant ass centipede just waltzing its way up my arm like “Hey girl what’s up doing anything this weekend?”
But I don’t have time for to deal with this guy and the monster on the screen was about to attack my character. So I decide that my in-game HP was more important than my in-real-life HP and ended up going for a 10-slash combo instead of killing the bug on my arm.
Annnnddddd just as I finish the monster off the centipede bites down on my arm and I start screaming bloody murder partly because of the pain and mostly because having a giant centipede hanging off of your arm is just pretty fucking scary.
Fast forward a few minutes later mom’s icing my arm and screaming her lungs out: “If you even had a brain the size of Justin Bieber’s dick to press the pause button, you would never have fucked up like this!” (Pardon the strange wording, we speak Chinese at home and this is the most literal translation I could come up with.)
TLDR: Decided to kill a monster on-screen than a monster in real life. Ended up with a centipede bite and a roasting from my mom.
it’s “Dark Soul,” the famous protagonist of the hit franchise, Dark Souls! known for his famous quotes: “everything is darkest before the soul” and “every soul has its dark”
I want to hit your face with a brick
chill out and have a drink from the ester flask
Dark Soul is the Dark Souls of protagonists
well it’s not necessarily wrong. I mean, the protag of dark souls has a human soul which is a fraction of THE dark soul so it’s not entirely inaccurate to say that the protag of dark souls is dark soul.
and, if you can’t get toasted pearl Couscous handpicked and blessed by a Moroccan shaman on the first tuesday of the winter harvest for your Sautéed Escarole then store bought is fine
Do older ppl expect us to believe they never took photos of their kids while they were growing up
it’s almost like when you have the ability to take several pictures at once for no cost, you can take a shit ton of pictures of shit as opposed to the old way of taking photos where you don’t even know if it turns out nice until after several weeks so you had to take a boring picture and hope for the best..
Teachers be like “I’m more than happy to accommodate students with mental illnesses or disabilities. I just don’t excuse any absences, offer extra credit, or accept late homework. Also my only office hours are off campus on the last full moon of every other month”
