Silver Tongue

Jan 22

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lycannes:

What if instead of gilly weed Harry had showed up to the black lake challenge in muggle scuba gear like “like where’s your advanced magic now bitches? Got me a free fishing knife with this thing”

Imagine if he used muggle items to solve all the challenges? Like, if the first challenge the dragons were susceptible to catnip and he just waltzed in and gave the dragon catnip for the egg and for the maze he just used a GPS to keep track of the mazes paths to win?

(via )

mamasynth:

beachdeath:

imagine being a han/leia shipper in 1983 and you’ve spent three years hearing from the luke/leia shippers how there’s no chance of han/leia happening because han’s probably dead now and besides the empire strikes back literally ended with luke and leia holding each other and staring into deep space so like obviously you’re an idiot for shipping han/leia and you need to get with the winning team… and then imagine going into that movie… and walking out of that movie… imagine that level of schadenfreude and personal satisfaction

Somewhere in a college lunch room, May 24th, 1983

we popping the BIGGEST bottles when lulei happens tomorrow

(via )

It’s our first campaign, starting at the beginning, and…

yourplayersaidwhat:

DM: Alright, so who wants to do what?

Death Servant: I would like to enter the bar.

DM: Alright, you enter the bar.

Death Servant: I’d like to roll a perception check.

Everyone in the party: Alriiight, the first perception check! You got this!

DM: Okay, roll a d20. What did you get?

Death Servant:

DM: Well…?

Death Servant: *posts a picture of the roll; it’s a 1*

Everyone: *laughing hysterically*

DM: Well… You slam your face into the bar counter. You notice that the wood is really nice looking…!

(via deep-sea-prince)

(via robustquestioner-deactivated202)

The Three Todds

yourplayersaidwhat:

The characters: tiny gnome druid who has almost no ability to attack, played by my sister. High moon elf ranger who hates everyone, played by me. A grueling dungeon fight to save a goblin captive. We’re all almost dead, but there’s one last thing the druid wants… to free three gigantic attack wolves that tried to kill us less than 20 minutes ago.

Druid: I want to free the wolves!

Ranger: Absolutely not.

Druid: Oh come on, they’ll be stuck here all alone!! They’ll die!

Ranger: Ok?? You’ll die if you get anywhere near them!

Druid: Oh whatever, I’m gonna free them. I roll a wisdom check on the wolves. *Rolls a nat 20*

DM: (still scrambling to get notes on wolves) Uhhhhhhhhh… *rolls nat 1 for the wolves*

DM: (holding back laughter) The wolves stop snarling and sit down, staring at you with their tails wagging.

Druid: I free them!!

DM: The wolves sniff you and rub against you, clearly trusting.

Druid: Yes!! New pets!! I’m gonna name you Todd! and you Todd 2 and you Todd III.

Keep in mind that this player gave her character 4 names with carefully researched meanings and now it’s just. 3 Todds, the vicious attack puppies.

(via deep-sea-prince)

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