she’s right listen to her
(via deep-sea-prince)
[video]
Trump supporters are just figuring out that the Affordable Care Act and Obamacare are the same thing. It would be funny if it weren’t so sad and pathetic. Unbelievable.
lol I can’t deal with this
(via deep-sea-prince)
child: mom theres a wolf growling at me
mom: he’s just picking on you because he likes you
child: he’s biting my head
mom: he has a crush on u
(via deep-sea-prince)
Straight dudes are their own worst enemies when it comes to getting laid.
Like, i know so many girls who are down for something more casual and who actually have really low standards that boil down to “treat me like a person, not a talking fleshlight”. And dudes refuse to even meet those standards!
Like, you know how many times I’ve been talking to a guy and I’ve already decided that when we hang out I’d down to mess around, only for the guy to start talking super graphically or send me a picture of his dick–and then literally all desire I had for him went out the windows.
Like dudes are so obsessed with sex that theyre scaring almost-certain sex partners away because they refuse to act like human beings capable of rational thought.
THIS
(via robustquestioner-deactivated202)
Adult things arent NEARLY as complex as I thought they were growing up I just walked into bank of america and said im here to open a checking account and they said ok and opened me a checking account
If you have anxiety about being an adult, it may help to think of adult things as basically just doing a lot of quests.
Me: [googles “where do i get a passport”]
Me: [goes to that building]
Me: [asks first person I encounter] Where do I get a passport?
Them: Third floor, room twelve.
Me: [goes to that room]
Me: [asks first person I encounter] Where do I get a passport?
Them: That desk over there.
Me: [goes to that desk]
Me: Where do I get a passport?
Them: Fill out this form.
Me: [thinking] Silver key opens the garden gate, in the garden is the red key, which opens the red door, there’s a boy in the red house who tells you his dog is trapped in the old abandoned barn and can I please rescue him…being an adult is a serious of fetch quests and waiting in lines
also you roll bluff a lot
i mean a LOT
and a lot of figuring out where and how to best farm gold
(via robustquestioner-deactivated202)
[video]
[video]
when cant feel my face comes on the radio this is all i think about
getting murdered by enemy meis
