The way Overwatch goes about its lore is so weird. Like, what other work of fiction is there where the main product (in this case, the game itself) is the part that’s considered non-canon?
I want to become a tour guide of one of those haunted asylum tours. I’d sort of hunch over in my wheelchair, wrapped in a cloak, greeting the people. They’ll be nudging each other, waiting to hear about the crazies.
I’ll beckon them with a single finger, wheeling backwards, letting the darkness consume me. They’ll follow, inch by inch, already trembling with adrenaline.
We’ll enter the asylum. It will be dark. Gloomy.
“Take your seats,” I say.
They’re confused but comply, feeling in the dark, finally reaching a table. They can’t wait. They have their cameras prepared.
Somebody asks if you can still hear the patients’ screams in the corridors.
“Well,” I say, “you can hear someone’s screams.”
Without warning, the door crashes shut. We hear a lock. People start screaming. Panicking. At that moment, the lights come on. We’re sitting in a lecture hall. I whisk off my cloak to reveal a perfectly tailored suit.
“All right, folks,” I say. “Let’s talk about how every single horrifying event that happened in asylums was a direct result of the doctors and nurses committing medical malpractice rather than the patients themselves, shall we? We’ll start with Rosemary Kennedy. Someone get the lights. I have a PowerPoint.”
why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”
equalizerthepegasus asked: I've done this incorrectly before. Painful times for sure. But I am curious as to how you shaved it, because the way you do it matters a ton.
The only thing that’d be more potentially embarrassing than my internet history would be my calculator history, a chronicle of all the painfully simple math I couldn’t manage to do in my head.
