remember when the poison status was intense as fuck and you had to rush your poisoned pokemon to a pokemon center and the game would make that awful fucking noise that made you feel bad for allowing such a thing to happen to your pokemon
I want to write an alternative version of Romeo and Juliet where instead of being a little ponce and trying to work things out for himself, Romeo asks his smarter friends what to do about the whole thing and Benvolio and Mercutio come up with the world’s greatest plan:
Marriage of convenience between Juliet and Mercutio.
Think about it.
Juliet’s parents want her to marry into the Prince’s family. Mercutio is a good compromise between no marriage and Paris.
Mercutio probably won’t get his inheritance if he keeps being HELLA FUCKING GAY ALL OVER THE PLACE so a beard is only a benefit to him.
They would probably get along great rolling their eyes at how adorably stupid Romeo is.
Romeo and Benvolio could get a “bachelor pad” right next to Juliet and Mercutio’s house. Every night, Romeo and Mercutio high five as they hop the fence to go bang their one true love.
The second half of the play is just all of them trying to keep up the charade and being “THIS CLOSE” to getting caught all the time. But everything ends nicely because true love conquers all.
Everybody wins. Nobody dies.
THE SHAKESPERE AU I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED
DUDE DID YOU JUST FIX ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC PLAYS EVER CREATED?!
ONCE AGAIN EVERYTHING IS SOLVED BY THE QUEER LENS.
I’m so pissed and feeling so lesbian big sister-y because I know full well that if I had been on tumblr when I was a young teen I would have put shit tons of selfies in the lesbian tag.
Tumblr has labeled anything under that tag as being inherently pornographic. They have labeled selfies of literal children as porn.
Young lesbians. You are not dirty. You are not a fetish. You are not a porn category. You are beautiful and I love you.
