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At the last party I went to three drunk girls fishtail braided my hair by committee
a drunk girl drew an eye on the back of my hand and then patted it with satisfaction and whispered “count olaf”
once at a barbecue a drunk girl gave the surgical scar on my shoulder a butterfly kiss and said “you’re cured”
A drunk girl at a bar I was at became worried that I wasn’t getting enough nutrition and proceeded to hold peanuts to my lips and just keep saying “peanut peanut” until I would eat it. And after I allowed her to feed me a peanut she pet my hair and said “Thank you”.
Drunk girls, saving your life one wtf at a time.
one time a drunk girl started crying because she said she loved my eyebrows so much
a drunk girl in blue pants, a white shirt, and a black vest held a broken bathroom stall door closed for me at a bar one night and i, another drunk girl, kept referring to her as “my hero, my han solo”
(Source: curiovsly, via guardingafterdawn-deactivated20)
If you choose to accept it. Give Donald Trump the Bennigans Cummerbund and Icky Azaghâl treatment and come up with increasingly ridiculous plays on his name. And (this is critical), NEVER USE HIS REAL NAME AGAIN. Can you imagine the Twitter meltdown if he found out that everyone had taken to calling him ridiculous names? It would be glorious.
Dumbold Tramp.
Dernald Frump
Tronald Dump
Trombone Klump.
dolan pump
deeznuts grump
dangan trompa
Donwad trupef
Doofus Frump
Dingus Dump
Wrongold Dump
Doonal Tromp
doodle troop
Dingus Trumpet
Dronko Tungus
Dumble Trope
Dumbass Slump
Dismal Frump
Dongle Flump
Tronald Dump
I was going to say Dump Truck but then I realized that they actually provided a necessary service to the community.
Dobangle Trampoline
Dingle Tingle
Donald Duck
(via guardingafterdawn-deactivated20)
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at least h**b l**e is over
HERB LORE??
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
HERB LORE
(Source: dippy-in-space, via markiplier)
thirdeyes-deactivated20160902 asked: Team AsgoreDidAFewThingsWrongButIStillWannaBakeHimCookiesAndForHimToAdoptMe
kkkkkkkkkkkkkekeke
Team AsgoreHonkedUpHellaBadButI’dStillHaveTeaAndSnuggleHimALil
Team I know asgore did some things and it is hard to forgive him but I still love him as a character despite not condoning his actions
Check it, I got my tongue stuck!
You’re so tall I have to stand on a stool.
The difference between a Waxwing and an X-wing.
(via guardingafterdawn-deactivated20)
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