It feels like I’ve talked about this before, but to me the funniest version of Portal is if Chell is deaf.
Like, most of the major story beats, at least the ones that directly affect her, have a prominent visual component so she’s following along with the basics. But she has no idea who cave johnson is, or what wheatley was trying to explain to her, and she certainly wasn’t hurt by any of glados’ insults.
but the best part of this headcanon is imagining glados checking chell’s personnel file years down the line, noticing the word “deaf” for the first time, and just going “WHAT???”
Glados learning sign language so Chell can hear at least one of her excellent monologues and Chell just closes her eyes
I find that last thing extra funny because glados learning sign language despite her not having hands and also being able to display words on the various screens throughout aperture science is the most aperture science thing to do
basically if disney tanked tomorrow and never made any content again i would point and laugh and cheer and sing and roast a marshed mallow over the fire, oh what a beautiful sight, oh what a beautiful world where art could be art again
To anyone who thinks “oh, but I like Marvel/Star Wars/the animated canon,” I have good news! Lots of other people like these things too! In fact, so many people like these things that, if Disney folded, someone else would snap the licences right up! In fact, I can confidently say that if all copyrights were cancelled tomorrow, you would have *way more* Star Wars movies, and they would be allowed to take actual chances in terms of their narrative and character decisions! You don’t actually *need* an enormous multinational monopoly named after a long-dead founder to bring you content featuring characters and scenarios created by other, often long-dead, people! You don’t *need* someone charging you rent for something that would otherwise be free! In fact, you need that like you need a hole in the head!
