Silver Tongue

May 30

dduane:

petermorwood:

baddingtonbitch:

headspace-hotel:

thelifeandtimesofacrazyblond:

thelifeandtimesofacrazyblond:

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i’m fucking shrieking with laughter. It sounds like his dick is a deranged yard sprinkler or a terrified pigeon turned loose in an apartment.

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This clip looks like a major league piss-artist in action. 

If Wikipedia and the few times I’ve seen him on TV are anything to go by, that’s Giles Coren in a nutshell.

…I’m sorry. (Or no, I’m not.) But his dick “rattled on her teeth”? Rattled?

(walking off)(smh) Boy needs to have that looked into.

(via aroacedavestrider)

adilia-the-kouhai:

spaceshipsandpurpledrank:

spaceshipsandpurpledrank:

@drukhari

never in my life will I be this cool

(via newbarrk)

thatscribblingrat:
“this is like my most hit tweet of all time
”

thatscribblingrat:

this is like my most hit tweet of all time

(via newbarrk)

juegosintiperojuegocontigo:

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(via newbarrk)

moringmark:

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(via adurot)

voltsm:

voltsm:

the only issue i have with totk so far is that it is not very dumb-friendly. got to a shrine that honest to god made me go “nintendo i have no clue what the fuck you want from me”

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saw this tweet which was the exactly shrine i made this post about. glad we all on the same page

you could fuse the balls to spears and throw them at targets to bypass the puzzle. the answer tho, was golf

(via bloodsbane)

huffylemon:

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(via thatneoncrisis)

manywinged:

manywinged:

nothing sluttier than lighting up a cigarette immediately after an absolutely brutal fight and inhaling deeply before exhaling the smoke with a sigh of relief while still disheveled and covered in blood and coming down from the adrenaline high. you could literally have sex onscreen and it would be less erotic.

and getting someone else to light the cigarette for you because you’re too badly injured/exhausted to do it yourself… that’s gay sex baby

bonus points if the person who lights your cig is the person you were fighting and they ended up just as fucked up as you are

(via thatneoncrisis)

leeleebug3:

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It was funnier in my head shshsb

(via rosexknight)

stantler:

zanabism:

peteseeger:

originalzipperalmondrebel:

tariqah:

Americans be like: My grandpa 😠😠😠 served in the Korean War 😠😠😠 and killed 9 people 😠😠😠 to fund his college degree in clownery 😠😠😠 Respect him or leave the country 😡😡😡🤬🤬🤬

That’s a super light story huh? My great grandfather got killed in action from a land mine to protect this country. If you don’t wanna respect the history or stand for a national anthem😁then leave to your peaceful home and fuck right off

How did your great grandpa stepping on a landmine protect this country

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Happy Memorial Day

(via rosexknight)