Silver Tongue

Mar 20

katsdisturbed:
“wind-up-key:
“ tubaterry:
“”
Pronounce Saxophone like Persephone, I dare you
”
I like this post.
”
this is Aristotle at chipotle all over again

katsdisturbed:

wind-up-key:

tubaterry:

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Pronounce Saxophone like Persephone, I dare you

I like this post.

this is Aristotle at chipotle all over again

(via crouton-knight)

tacticiankate:
“my circle of stars tiefling druid Honeymoon, for jocat’s golden cay mini-campaign
”

tacticiankate:

my circle of stars tiefling druid Honeymoon, for jocat’s golden cay mini-campaign

(via rockboci)

(via rockboci)

meggannn:

having to pay for sebastian, the only straight companion in da2, is still funny on its own but I feel there’s also metatextual humor if we take the “varric is narrating this whole thing” to another level

like it’s no secret varric cannot stand this guy so the thought of cassandra piping up like “wait, wasn’t the champion also friends with the prince of starkhaven? you haven’t mentioned him at all”

and varric rolls his eyes so far back into his head he almost gives himself a migraine, then she insists “no, he is! I know I heard this, stop lying to me dwarf!”

he’s like “andraste’s nutsack, fine, but if you wanna hear about him I’m gonna need some financial incentive to jog my memory. he was so boring I often forget he was even there”

“you can’t be serious, are you saying you’ve completely forgotten everything about him?”

“seven sovereigns for the choir boy, seeker, take it or leave it”

(via rockboci)

katco-cereal:

katco-cereal:

Thank you, /r/ProgrammerHumor, I love you endlessly.

Redditors competing to make the worst volume sliders possible…

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special delivery for @soffies!!!

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(via newbarrk)

melonsap:

lesbian-vegeta:

melonsap:

melonsap:

You know how corn was selectively bred out of grasses, and bananas used to have tons of rocky seeds, and avocados used to be like 90% pit, and watermelons once looked

Image ID: A watermelon that's mostly rind, with the rind swirling into what little pink there is. End IDALT

like this?

I think we should breed the pits out of mangoes

Image ID: A set of tags that read as follows. "What in the fuck," "That's real???" "Bee I trust you but like aaaaaa." End IDALT

Yep. And that kind of watermelon itself is after centuries upon centuries of selective breeding!

The other above-mentioned fruits:

Image ID: A small, cornlike grain being pried out of its husk. End IDALT

Teosinte, the ancestor of corn

Image ID: A banana full of big, black seeds. End IDALT

A not-seedless banana

Image ID: An avocado with only a millimeter of flesh around the pit. End IDALT

A wild, unaltered avocado

We need to do this with mangoes

Mangoes have pits to keep us humble. Without them we would fall to insatiable bloodlust for more mango.

Maybe I want to be a mangpire

(via moonpaw)

that1nkyone:

elodieunderglass:

p1ratew3nch:

dracula61:

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The urge to balance them on my finger or perhaps my nose

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(via rockboci)

xxtc-96xx:

I wanted to do this one for a while

Mar 19

askfallenroyalty:

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[will add transcript later tonight, sorry!]

askfallenroyalty:

[img id: Chara rubs their forehead from Flowey's smacks. They're turned back to the stove, cooking once again. "To shut you up I'll tell you AFTER I finish dinner." Chara scoffs, "tch, Fine! You didn't have to be such a di-" They begin to stay, stopping once they realize Aslo is in front of them.ALT
Chara and Aslo stare at each other. "Doink," Chara says, "I was going to say 'Doink.'" Aslo laughs, "Oh I thought you were going to say [censored]." Chara is shaken to the core.ALT
They sharply turn to Flowey to glare. They're overjoyed. "Never not funny," they gleefully explain. Chara turns around, annoyed. "No wonder you're getting divorced." Flowey shakes the spoon at them, hurt. "Hey! You promised not to bring that up!"ALT
The family is now sitting at the dinner table. Flowey stares at their mac n cheese with a dire expression. "...This is serious, Chara. I really, really, really need you to not laugh." Chara agrees, "Asriel, I would never make fun of your body. Health is nothing to joke about."ALT
Flowey is relieved, turns to their daughter. "Aslo, can you promise too?" She nods, "Sure!" and begins to eat. Flowey follows along, taking a big bite of the mac.ALT
Aslo watches as Flowey keeps a determined face while eating. "Why are you doing that?" Chara gently shushes her. "(Remmy is focusing.)" Flowey eats with complete concentration, there's a look of apperication past their focus.ALT
Asriel transforms into her normal boss monster body, flowers fly around the air.ALT
"Cool!" Aslo cheers, while Asriel waits nervously to the side.  Chara is confused. "What the heck? I don't see anything wrong   with you. What gives?"ALT
Asriel points to herself, frantic and eyes wide with tears. "Gah! Don't you see it?! My hair is receding like how Dad's did!"  Her shirt says "Coffee Queen"ALT
Asriel is crying at the table, hands over their face. Chara waves a hand, "Aw is that all? It's just hair! Besides, It's barely noticeable." "IT IS! Dad had said he started balding after I was born! Remember how back his hair got? I can't escape it! I'm doomed!" Aslo seems happy, "I like it!" she assures. id end.]ALT

Part 4!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3