Obi-Wan can find an invisible planet hidden by a devious Sith Lord, Anakin can’t find his ex-best friend on his own home planet while the guy is still using his own damn name.
I know we give Obi-wan a lot of shit for leaving Luke with his real surname but Anakin really is that stupid
the perfect hiding place: the sandiest fucking planet that anakin would never set foot on again
I’d like to remind everyone again that it’s literally canon that Vader can’t step foot on Tatooine because the desert gets into his creaky old man robot joints and makes his suit break down
aka the sand is coarse, rough, irritating, and gets everywhere
i d o n t l i k e s a n d
okay but what if everyone was like ‘vader, kenobi’s on tattooine. he’s obviously on tattooine. he’s been there for years. he’s just right fucking there, we all know it.’ and vader is just desperately shaking down jedi like they’re magic eight-balls and he wants a better fortune. like ‘no i don’t like that try again’.
kenobi’s just sitting there in his pile of sand like a smug fucking bastard. he doesn’t need to hide jack shit. he went to the tattooine board of tourism and got them to print up flyers that say ‘COME TO TATTOOINE, WE HAVE SAND’ and luke is probably going to be safe until his midlife fucking crisis at this rate.
palpatine finds vader aimlessly checking behind pieces of furniture in some shitty space motel on kamino
‘he’s on tattooine,’ palpatine says.
‘nuh uh,’ vader says, and peers under a couch.
peers under a couch
This is the best Star Wars post I have read in a while.
obi wan lived in the area that anakin slaughtered the raiders for killing his mom. The darkness that was left from that action is what hid obi wan from being detected
Oh my god, I’ve just seen this story on instagram about this guy that filled his bathtub with waterbead…except he didn’t think about how he was going to empty it.
So he unplugged the bathtub which was apparently the worst idea he could possibly have because this happened
So he panicked and started asking people on the internet what he should do. Which was also a bad idea.
First suggestion: flush the toilet
This caused a smelly overflow that flooded the whole bathroom.
Second suggestion: vaccum the beads
His vaccum caught fire.
At this point it had actually spread to the neighborhood and people came to ask question but he denied knowing anything about it. He then discovered that it’s invaded the whole sewer system.
And yet, he continued to take suggestion from the internet.
Third suggestion: put salt in
It actually worked. Well, until.
Poop apprently started flooding his house.
And then the streets.
It all happened yesterday so we’re still waiting on an update on the situation but I hadn’t laugh like this in a while.
It’s in french, but you get it even if you don’t speak it and his screams of panic are hilarious
Word of warning: don’t fill your bathtub with waterbeads. Just don’t.
Update on the situation. The waterbeads have totally blocked the sewer system. He received a letter from town hall telling people to report nuisances to the cops that are searching for the culprit.
He’s in so much trouble that I’m starting to feel guilty for finding this funny…but still kinda laughing about it.
“why are you so gungho on bernie” some 26,000 people die each year in america without health insurance. because it took my mom 9 months with broken bones inside her body for her to be able to get surgery she needed to walk again. because people in a 1st world country are unable to afford insulin. because im done with the ‘best’ canidate every year being the one who sure, won’t kill me outright, but won’t do anything to get anything changed regardless.
this isn’t a 'fun’ little game. it’s not 'just’ politics. it is literally life and death for hundreds of thousands of americans, including me, and including people you know. change is now or never and it won’t happen without you.
God imagine being in that crowd, seeing a guy try and assisinate this debater who deflects a bullet and then leaps like a panther into the dude and takes out his eyes before throwing him off a cliff
Husband is chemist and he says the gases that react to make the fire have weight, but the fire itself is energy and therefore does not have weight as we measure it.
cold medicated brain thanks mister indigo for his service
Role swap au where Zuko was the Avatar who got frozen for a hundred years, so when he’s rescued from the ice instead of a goofy twelve year old Katara catches this mysterious teenager with long hair and a cool scar and a fucking DRAGON
Katara: BOY???? HOT BOY?????? HOT TEENAGE BOY?????????
Zuko: *speaks*
Katara: nevermind I hate him
How does Aang factor into this? I ask because the more I think about it the more I want him to somehow be trying to capture the Avatar.
Aang is 112 years old, decided he was going to be Zuko’s airbending teacher, and refuses to take no for an answer
Aang: Aw, the new Avatar doesn’t want me. Aang: *gets out a weighted net* Time for Plan B then.
JDJSHJABDBFJSH
Look, you know how you keep a net from falling on you? YOU AIRBEND IT, SUCKA. Air comes right after fire in the cycle so it’s not like the guy has any other options. Do you want a flaming net falling on you? No? Then learn to airbend. Or this tiny old man will cart you away like a trussed turkey and lecture you about the power of laughter, going with the flow, opening your chakras, and other hippie shit.
Sokka, slouching against a fence, not moving: Oh nooooooo, that creepy old man stole the Avataaaaaaaaaar. Sokka, sitting down on the ground: We should dooooo something. Sokka, pulling out his lunch: Otherwise he might actually learn something. That would be teeeerrible. Katara, indignant rage coursing through her body: Sokka!!!!!!!! We have to go look for him!!!! Sokka: Might! Actually! Learn! Something! Katara! Katara: *wavers* Katara, also sitting down: We have to go look for him…. *gets out her own sandwich* But, maybe after lunch.
I love that this transforms Aang’s role in the full Team Avatar familial situation from the baby of the family to the Grandpa with weird hobbies
My brain, immediately after the “Aang won’t take no for an answer” post:
Aang: I’m gonna ride him! *jumps on Zuko’s shoulders*
Actually, I thought a bit more about this: If Aang is “grandpa figure who won’t fucking stop teaching Zuko to be a better and more spiritually fulfilled person,” then what is Iroh doing?
And then it hit me.
Iroh: *sitting in a teahouse at a paisho table* Iroh, deadpan: I must capture the last airbender. Iroh: It is the only way to make sure the powe rof the Avatar won’t be turned on the Fire Nation. Iroh: Only then will I be redeemed in the eyes of the Fire Lord for my failure at Ba Sing Se. Iroh: … Iroh: Anyway, it’s your turn.
About half of the B plots are just Iroh finding new ways to feign incompetence and bad luck so that his political watchdog can’t prove that he’s letting Aang - and by extension Zuko - get away.
Sometimes Iroh plays paisho with Aang, whose entire disguise during these games consists of a painfully fake mustache.
AANG WAS THE OTHER PLAYER IN THAT SCENE OF COURSE IT’S PERFECT (the moustache is just a bit of Appa’s fur tied in a string)
heres the question…. since aang and zuko would be roughly the same age in this AU…. Would they have known each other as kids? and more importantly? would they have gotten into shenanigans with boomy?
