via reddit.com
Once again shown up by the power and dignity of the root vegetable
(via bloodsbane)
“Stop following me! You aren’t really my twin sister.”
I love how the bird acts like they aren’t following them when the cat turns around
it wants….to pull that tail……. its corvid instincts demand it
(via rockboci)
can you believe this fucking idiot is like 40 years old
Concept: fairy tale where the wicked step-parent (who is of course also some sort of warlock) transforms the princess into a swan, as one does, but rather than running off to mope around in a lake and be beautifully tragic, the princess decides to stick around the palace and cause problems on purpose.
It is a beautiful day in the palace, and you are a horrible swan princess.
(via robustquestioner)
my-gender-is-glow-in-the-dark:
MILLENNIALS ARE BLAMED FOR EVERYTHING IT’S GETTING SO OLD
The Black Death wasn’t transmitted by rats. It was transmitted by millennials.
millennials shot versace
millennials killed off the dinosaurs
Millennials shot Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria and Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg.
Cain was a millennial
Millennial caused the Great Permian Extinction
The Titanic didn’t hit an iceberg. It collided with floating colony of ocean millennials.
Millennials stabbed Caesar.
10 Surprising Historical Genocides You May Not Realize Millennials Were Responsible For
Millennials responsible for the assasinations of JFK and Abraham Lincoln? Click to doscover the true story
Shock study proves millennials started the Great Fire of London, 1966. Here’s how that effects you
Millennials were responsible for the most recent gallifreyan genocide
“Most recent”
Omfg 😆
Millennials turned the waters red and brought a plague of locusts and blotted out the Sun
(via robustquestioner)
candace-gertrude-flynn-deactiva:
hero: IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO???
villain: *choking back tears* uh, yeah, i’m actually trying really hard here man
hero: *now looking uncomfortable* oh
hero: hey man its okay that was good you uh you did good back there
villain: i did good??
hero: i mean- bad!! you did bad!!
villain: I did BAD?!?!
hero: i mean… you did good at being bad!
villain: oh… thank you?
hero: *awkwardness intensifies* no problem…
villain, tearing up again: no one has ever told me I’m good at anything!
hero: where are your parents I just want to talk
All the best hero - villain dynamics just lead right back to these two
(via chefpyro)
[video]
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(Source: betasunkern, via newbarrk)
When you run to the bathroom only to discover that massive load you were about to drop is actually 87% fart
