As you die, you wake up in a fiery place. You quickly realize you’re in hell. You ask the next demon why you are there, as you lived a very good life. “You’re not being punished”, he says. “You are the punishment.”
You honk in joy. It’s a lovely morning in Hell, and you are a horrible goose.
Like once a month I think about this guy I went on a date with four years ago who within the first ten minutes was like “I should probably clear the air, you might have heard of me. I’ve got a post on tumblr with over 100,000 notes.” And then proceeded to say it to me verbatim. I didn’t recognize it, and it wasn’t funny.