A nice looking couple brought their computer in for repair.
Client: It just stopped working.
They added offhandedly that they been smelling a “plastic” smell, and had also recently replaced a missing slot cover.
I nodded, outlined my usual fees and told them to expect a call when I’m done.
I cracked it open, but nothing could have prepared me for what I’d uncovered. Dildos. Dildos everywhere. Melted dildos everywhere.
They seemed a little surprised when I called them back in, and looked downright mortified when I showed them the cause of their computer trouble.It turns out that their toddler found mommy and daddy’s fun-time stash and jammed the computer full of dildos, which had melted from the heat. It looked like a Jell-o factory had exploded in there.
Even worse, they turned to me, and asked:
Client: But you can still fix it, right?
SMASH otp most adorable pair
(via siebewastaken)
Fun facts about your sign here
(via zodiacmind)
[video]
[video]
Burglar, my cat, just stumbled into the living room, wearing one of my panties on his head.
I went to check my underwear drawer.
The padlock was still in place.
My cat is a wizard.
You could say he’s a master thief. The kind that breaks into places undetected and nobody notices something is missing because all the measures to prevent theft are still in place…
You could say he’s a type of burglar…
A Cat Burglar…
free my boys
“Sirius I think we really fucked up this time.”
REBLOGGING FOR THAT COMMENT
A Tale as old as time… a love as… ah nevermind.
“James you idiot, I told you that you handle butterbeer worse than a house elf!”
(via pembrokewkorgi)
(Source: textsfromsuperheroes.com, via adurot)
Which Disney Villain Are You? → -
If you were a villain in the Disney universe, which one would you be?
Take this quiz and find out!I would definitely be Gaston
I don’t like the answer oh my god
best disney quiz in the world c:
That was weird.. I got Hades
I’m Scar. Makes sense.
Hades
I am okay with being the sassy metro lord of the underworld.
(Source: bit.ly, via scraps-is-busy)
