Chilled has his fightclub, Ze has his gay sheep farm and Tom has his farmer czar thing. What do smarty and galm have?
smarty is busy “accidentally” killing ze’s sheep and being killed by chilled.. galm is just trying to deal with all their shit
Actually, Smarty DID accidentally kill one sheep. Chilled purposely killed one and sheepnapped another.
(via sophieskarsgard)
but how do you convince little kids to wear clever costumes they won’t appreciate?
“mommy can i be batman?”
“no you and your brother are going as van gogh and the starry night painting, it’ll be so hilarious and witty”
“i want to be batman though”
“shhhhh mommy needs more followers on pinterest”
I JUST REALIZED WE DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT DINOSAURS SOUND LIKE! THEY COULD’VE BEEN SPEAKING FLUENT GERMAN FOR ALL WE KNOW
it’s too early for this late night tumblr shit
GUTEN MORGEN HERR PTERODACTYL
WIE GEHTS FRAU MASTADON
Oh my god neither of those are dinosaurs and there’s 145 million years separating them both, this post is a palaeontological disaster.
Thank you paleontologist side of tumblr. Also, you misspelled paleontological.
[video]
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! HOW THE HELL AM I ALMOST HALF A YEAR OLDER THAN KEVIN!? HOW THE ACTUAL FUCK AM I OLDER THAN KEVIN!? WHY IS KEVIN SO HOT AND I’M JUST SLIGHTLY ABOVE AVERAGE!?
NO BUT REAL TALK OK I WENT TO SCHOOL IN GEORGIA AND I EVEN HAD TEACHERS TELLING ME THAT I SHOULDN’T CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN BECAUSE IT WAS THE DEVIL’S BIRTHDAY AND I GOT SUSPENDED FOR 4 DAYS BECAUSE I WROTE AN ESSAY ENTITLED “You’re All Dumb, The Devil Wasn’t Even Born: The Story of All Hallow’s Eve” AND I TALKED ABOUT THE HISTORY OF HALLOWEEN, HOW IT WAS A PAGAN CELEBRATION TO VENERATE AND APPEASE THE DEAD AND HOW THE DEVIL WAS TECHNICALLY AN ANGEL THAT WAS CAST FROM HEAVEN AND BECAUSE ANGELS WERE CREATED BY GOD THEY WEREN’T BORN THEREFORE THE DEVIL COULDN’T HAVE A BIRTHDAY. MY PRINCIPAL WAS SO CONCERNED FOR ME BECAUSE I WAS IN 3RD GRADE AND HE GOT MAD AT MY MOM FOR RAISING SUCH A “DISRESECTFUL, HEDOONISTIC CHILD”. SHE BOUGHT ME ICECREAM AND LET ME WATCH CARTOONS WHILE I WAS OUT OF SCHOOL.
Except it’s not.
It’s the day before All Saint’s Day, hence the eve.
Where Catholics would go door to door offering “spirit cake” which were sweet pastries that represented the departed and in exchange they ask for donations.
Halloween is a Catholic holiday.
(via adurot)
[video]
Just letting people know that dex did not see steve, but a simple sticky piston.
