Silver Tongue

Oct 02

[video]

dr mario after physical: youre-a not supposed to-a shoot eggs from your-a mouth

lesserjoke:
Reblog this post with your weirdest ancestor’s name.
I had a great-grandfather named Kermit Dickman.
why did you start a competition that you’ve already won

(via liquidstar)

roswell-newton-vargas:

mega-miltanks:
roswell-newton-vargas:
roswell-newton-vargas:
We bought Mountain Dew flavored lip balm and now we just keep saying, “Bro, I need some gamer fuel,” and kissing each other.
This isn’t a cute relationship post. “We” are four grown men who are supposed to be working right now.
bro i think you got 3 boyfriends
Hell yeah.

(via )

[video]

notedchampagne:

a useful tip to all freshmen in surviving high school: unionize

berrystumpytail:

babushkaboi:
fast replies are so attractive like damn i got your attention like that
i thought this said reptiles

(via robustquestioner)

edwardfucks:

edwardfucks:
edwardfucks:
the Cullens would have to stop going to high school bc gen z is too powerful and would sniff out their obviously bizarre immortal energy in seconds like bloodhounds and expose them as literal vampires within days
like I’m barely gen z but these teenagers are on a totally different level of unhinged funny I’ve seen their tik toks. the Cullens literally don’t stand a chance they’re just gonna have to settle one day for a small school where everyone acknowledges that those are the vampire kids. and they all agree to just not tell anyone like the crowd in the Hannah Montana movie.
Edward Cullen getting bullied by gen Z'ers in the hallways being called “sucker” because he rambled on for 30 minutes in history class about world war one until someone snapped said “ok we get it Nosferatu you were there and fucked Ferdinand himself”

(via robustquestioner)

zicygomar:

spidantic:
shuttershocky:
“Hero with a psychopath past that the villain tries to bring out to prove they’re the same” is such an edgy and overdone trope but goddamn did MGR actually pull it off (with the most absurd dialogue ever written for a game no less.)

Like, ok, so Monsoon attempts to make Raiden see his pledge of protecting the weak is some weak shit he tells himself so he’s not too concerned with being knee deep in bodies, and that he loves killing just as much as them. The natural order is that the strong prey on the weak, yadda yadda supervillain stuff.

And then Raiden’s all “Ok you know what? You’re right. I fucking love killing. The strong really do prey on the weak; No more of this superhero shit, I’m back to my murderous Jack the Ripper persona. It’s time to kill the shit out of weak people”

And Monsoon’s all “Oh good good you’re just like us.”

Then Raiden goes “Oh yeah also there’s no one weaker than people who prey on innocents and the under privileged who can’t fight back.”
Jack: I just fucking love killing evil bastards protected by unjust laws
Monsoon: Wtf you can’t do that. That’s illegal
Monsoon, after convincing Jack to embrace his slashy-murdery side but then Jack just starts murdering him extra hard:

(via chefpyro)

periiwrinkles:

an important update

(Source: whitepeopletwitter, via rockboci)