highways in Massachusetts do this really cool thing where a lane will just abruptly disappear at inopportune times (right after highway entry ramps, in roundabouts, etc). half the time the sign warning you of this is placed basically where the lane ends anyways and the other half there just isnt a sign at all. there’s a part of my commute where the road goes from three lanes to one in 500 feet with no signs
this is what happens when you let horses from the 1800s do all of your city planning
god, kelly square is a fucking nightmare i swear everytime i go through it everyone decides to purposely ram into your car
one time i was driving through kelley square and someone fucking reversed at me. it is truly a godless patch of asphalt
I love watching Americans get angry about roads with more than two options
I don’t think you understand the horror that is Kelly Square, but I’d love to see a worse intersection if you know one
I think the most solid advice I was given about Kelly Square is “you just go if you don’t go that’s when you die”.
Massachusetts doesn’t believe in visibility, adequate lane width, or any form of predictability in roads. Five way intersections with no lights or clear right of way with bonus one of the spokes is at some absurd angle and is hiding behind a hedge - yeah that’s pretty average and thanks I hate it. You just drive and hope it all works out for the best, teeth grit and eyes steely as they gaze into traffic hell. Also they have a problem and that problem is their love of circles one after the other with traffic lights in the middle. What the fuck my dudes.
listen once you’ve been through it several dozen times you just gotta trust your gut instincts and take no shit from anyone else trying to muscle their way in
when i was checking out colleges in boston another girl on the tour, a native bostonian, said “you dont use turn signals. thats like showing your enemy your next move” and to this DAY it haunts me
Learning that the emergency stop lane becomes an EXTRA PASSING LANE during rush hour in Massachusetts was one of the most terrifying discoveries of my life.
Also the road structure was created by a drunk chimpanzee toddler who hasn’t slept in three days a piece of paper and a crayon. The resulting squiggles are what Massachusetts decided to use as a guide for construction.
As a friend once said about Kelley Square:
12 cars enter, 1d6+3 cars leave.
I’ve written about this before and my conclusion was that Massachusetts is the worst because of the sheer amount of malice that Mass plates confer on a vehicle. With situations like the Swindon Magic Roundabout in England, which look more complicated on paper, all of the drivers are still adhering to a social contract. While you may not understand their social contract, and their cultural values may be alien to your own, they are all still participating in the rule of law, and the majority of people are driving with a plan and a clear set of rules in their head. There is a complex network of social interactions that everyone has agreed to, and to maintain this, drivers will yield to you, sometimes out of respect for the law, but also out of kindness or pity. That does not work in Massachusetts, where they apparently really believe that do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Barry, attempting to explain some of the twin’s weirder antics: If Taako’s within a 10 meter radius of a recess cup, he will try to eat it, so always have an epipen.
Kravitz, writing this down: Um, okay.
Barry: Cool. Cool. I think that’s just about everything….Oh! Uh, and don’t say the phrase “Bottomless Pit” around both of them, okay? When they’re separate it’s fine, but not when they’re together.
Kravitz: W-Why?
Barry: Just…don’t…
*** Later, during double date night at Fantasy Olive Garden***
Kravitz: Okay! This is driving me mad. Why the hell can’t I say ‘Bottomless Pit’?
Lup, banging her fists on the table: BOTTOMLESS PIT BOTTOMLESS PIT
Taako, joining in turn:BOTTOMLESS PIT BOTTOMLESS PIT BOTTOMLESS–
When you’re an archaeologist with a set schedule, sometimes people really get to understand who you are
When I dug in France I always got a croissant at 0520 from the same exact place in Échemines. A week in, they had one lying on the counter for me by the time I walked in. By the second week I got the exact amount I’d pay in hand when I walked in, because they’d reliably have it ready. I made sure to tell the owners that I wasn’t returning on my last day of the dig.
I may mention that every time I ordered in French. On my last day the owners gave me hugs and kindly told me to never speak in French again
