Goblins do not have a concept of personal property or privacy. They’re often labelled simply as thieves, but they genuinely do not understand why a group of travellers would be upset by waking up to someone rummaging through their camp to see what they’ll find, pocketing whatever looks cool, and eating their rations. A goblin feels perfectly fine walking into another goblin’s house to do so.
They will also tell you everything about themselves to introduce themselves. Not only their name and where they live, but also what they do for a living, how many spouses and children they have, their parents and siblings’ names, what they have done with their lives and who their best friends are. A particularly accomplished goblin can and will take 20-30 minutes to fully introduce themselves.
Travellers who manage to start a polite conversation with a goblin instead of immediately resorting to violence to defend their property will soon - to their great confusion - be invited to the goblin’s home to meet their family and be welcome to stay as long as they need. This might feel strange to them, but deep down it’s a cultural misunderstanding.
The goblin list of things to include in one’s long introductions isn’t a standardised list, but goblins have a general idea of what they expect to hear in them. They don’t have a concept of private information any more than they have genuinely private property, and if someone’s list doesn’t involve spouses and children, that can only mean that they don’t have any. If a goblin won’t say where they live, that means they don’t have a home. If they don’t list who their friends are, that can only mean they don’t have any friends.
If a traveller only introduces themselves with their name, perhaps profession, and “this is my stuff”, then naturally that must be all that they have in the world. If they had friends, family, or anything else in life, obviously they would have said so. How horrible that someone doesn’t have anything but a name. And if you won’t tell them your name they’ll assume you don’t have one of those, either.
adventuerer: I am sir sterling, I kill dragons with my sword right here
goblin on the verge of tears: Thats the saddest thing ive ever heard. to think such a brave person is so alone
L'académie française is what happens when you allow your linguistists to become prescriptive instead of descriptive, and should serve as a warning to us all.
Une victoire pour la diversité! “La” covid est féminine!!!
my mom didn’t believe in lying to children so when I first asked about santa claus as a small child she was like “oh santa claus is another name for a man named saint nicholas who lived a long time ago. he was a very kind and generous man and he loved giving people presents and he would do things like put presents in people’s stockings when they were hung up to dry by the fire, so they would find them and be surprised. so now when we give presents at christmas it’s fun to pretend saint nicholas or ‘santa claus’ brings them. and we hang up stockings by the fire and when we get up in the morning there are presents in them, just like if saint nicholas was still alive to bring them!”
so that thanksgiving one of my uncles said jovially “so mac, are you being good for santa claus?” and little (not quite three year old) mac looked up and raised an eyebrow and said witheringly “he’s dead.”
I haven’t been on tumblr in ages but someone brought this post (and another) to my attention so here’s your story:
For starters, yes it’s real. The movie is called Merry Kissmas and you can see us in the opening credits. It’s a cheesy romcom christmas movie you can find on Netflix. I watched it, it’s so cheesy lol.
What happened was I was staying in this hotel in Downtown LA for Anime Expo and on my way back to the room, this film crew approached us and asked us to be extras in his movie because “it’ll be funny!” Sure why not! So it was totally intentional.
I still cosplay Fenris from time to time but I’m more active on my Facebook page if you want to find me/credit me!
ALT
