Silver Tongue

Aug 19

[video]

smythas:
rittie:
rittie:
APPARENTLY MY MOMS BOYFRIEND HAD JURY DUTY WITH JOHN MULANEY AND WAS SITTING NEXT TO HIM
imagine going to the jury and seeing him like i wouldn’t be able to keep it together emotionally i’d just be disqualified the plaintiff would be like “he stole my assets” and i’d be like I Have Fired The Criminal Catcher
John Mulaney Gives You The Death Sentence (ASMR)
Imagine being on trial and you look over at the jury and John Mulaney is just sitting there. How do you handle that, psychologically. How do you not conclude your life has turned into a piece of absurdist theatre

(via rockboci)

[video]

josefiendd:

sasukebelieves:
Let me tell you something. Sex is not fun. Sex is wrong. Immoral. Terrible. So stop having sex with your husbands. I will shoulder the burden of sin. I will fuck your husbands on your behalf.
Thank you sasuke

its him. the sfw sasuke. He has sex so that we dont have to

(via newbarrk)

trunksette:

drmccoynextdoor:
idiot-riker:
thinking abt that episode of TOS where Sulu finds a gun on the ground and is like “sweet” and just takes it
what’s better is that this planet was supposed to manifest your greatest fantasy and while everyone else was imagining sex and power Sulu is just like

george takei is such a treasure

(via rockboci)

chowell365 asked:

Is a crossbow a gun? What about a bow and arrow? What about a stapler? Where is the line between gun and everything else?

demilypyro:

I think it has to go boom inside to be a gun.

a crossbow is a firearm but not a gun.

(via rosexknight)

katy-l-wood:

verilidaine:
katy-l-wood:
mentallyunawareofpapaya:
fansonia:
genderlich:
lady-redshield-writes:
panismightier:
infernoking:
honeybeejohn:
aelinsilverpine:
lianabrooks:
weareoracle:
chuckyzoopa:
thedaniverse:
thedaniverse:
I am a little high but what if people proposed with beautiful, intricate knives. Ladies would gather around the table and be like “guess what finally happened!!” And pull this beautiful, intricate dagger out of her purse and all the other ladies would gasp and congratulate her
Me: I’m a little high but –
Y'all rushing to that reblog button:
Originally posted by exploratorium
It’s an awesome idea tho
Because I have a tag for pretty weaponry, some knives I’d accept as proposals follow:
I said yes!
(but, actually, hubby bought me a dive knife when we got married so this works…)
I can 100% get behind this as a new tradition.
Ok but this is amazing becuase knives are dangerous and you can use them to hurt other people but when someone proposes with one it’s symbolic like “yes I love you and trust you so much I’m asking you a very vulnerable question with something you could hurt me with but I know you won’t”
@kinglesbiancore
@lady-redshield-writes this seems up your alley
This isn’t just up my alley, it’s traveled all the way down the alley, through my front door, and is sitting on my couch. I love this so much.
@sparklemotion24 I know we’re doing rings but these are amazing
AAAAAAAHHHH IT’S THE POST I’VE SEEN IN SCREENSHOTS don’t mind if I just-
the only way im getting married
This is the only type of proposal I will ever accept.
I’m going to take the opportunity to plug a blacksmith whose work I adore who is among the many small-business artisans and vendors whose livelihood has been slash by the pandemic. This is Iron Wolf Forge, and they make these beautiful flower daggers (and other custom work!).

If anyone earlier in the notes on this with a larger following sees this and can reblog, that would be amazing <3
A + Proposal plan: Pulling one of these out of a bundle of flowers.

(via thescyfychannel)