the road to el dorado when in the context of a d&d game is the most astounding and hellish streak of 1′s and 20′s
“The people think that you’re gods, what do you do?”
“…we go along with it.”
“Roll performance.”
“…I got a one.”
“Your foot gets caught in the stirrup while you try to dismount from the horse. You look ridiculous.”
“Well I rolled a twenty.”
“…somehow, a volcano stops erupting on your cue. Everyone falls to their knees in awe.”
“I roll to come up with an escape plan”
“Alright roll”
“…I got a one”
“I try to convince the horse to break us out”
“Roll…animal handling?”
“I got a twenty”
“You have been caught playing ball with the locals. What do you do?”
“I roll for persuasion…one.”
“You and your fellow player are roped into playing a game against a rival team of the biggest, buffest people imaginable while the entire city watches.”
“We decide to try cheating.”
“Okay, roll.”
“Twenty.”
“You use a physics-defying armadillo as a ball and he helps propel you to the win.”
i dont think ill ever get over merles line in the beach episode “they dont like my gifts?” bc (1) what a fucking perfect line delivery from clint mcelroy, and (2) to this day i dont know whether merle was being genuine or if he was fucking with lucretia IC and that’s beautiful
my best guess is that he was absolutely fucking with lucrecia but wanted to get some sympathy points because he was poisoned the entire trip
