Light a candle directly in front of your automatic Glade spray air freshener that way every 9 minutes a fireball shoots across your living room table, intimidating your house guests, asserting your dominance in your domain
use the motion activated glade sprayer to set up a fireball trap that can deter burglars on christmas
One day Edward gets a call from Jacob and he’s like “DUDE TURN ON GHOST ADVENTURES RIGHT NOW THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT YOU” and they’re in an old “haunted” Chicago hospital and Zak Bagans says “one of the victims of the Spanish influenza was a seventeen year old boy named Edward who disappeared with no trace one day. Will we come into contact with his spirit tonight?” And Edward of course has to sit down and watch the whole thing and every time they hear anything they’re like “EDWARD? IS THAT YOU?” And Edward just yells at the screen “YEAH, MAYBE”
The family eventually gets a whiteboard to keep track of how many times they’ve each been featured on a ghost hunting show. Alice is in the lead.
using the psychic powers they call the ghost hunters phone at the time they would be trying to contact the “ghost” just to troll the fuck out of them
I had a dream I was able to time travel and I went like 10,20,100,1000,2000 years into the future but the instant I went to 4,000 I got stuck in a time dilation jail set up by the American government in the year 3,877 in which anyone that tried to time travel back or forth across May 23, 3877 while on Earth would end up stuck in this time dilation chamber trap to stop time travelers but like it was so crazy and mismanaged because it was legit capturing like every single time traveler ever and the place had only been open for 12 minutes and was already getting overpopulated with nonstop multiple recursive instances of this one other guy trying to break previous versions of himself out of this god damn time traveler jail
that is fucking hysterical and absolutely sounds like something the American Government would set up.
