consider: teenagers aren’t apathetic about everything they’re just used to you shitting all over whatever they show excitement about
Teen: *gets a job*
“I GOT THE JOB!”
Parents: Well, when I was your age, I already had 5 jobs and was supporting my family
Teen: *gets all A’s*
“I worked really hard!”
Parents: Well, of course you did, this is the expectation, not a celebration.
probably why so many teens take to social media where they can enthusiastically share their interests and achievements and get positive feedback that their parents never gave
Also they only place value on whatever the deem worthy. It only seems like we don’t care because we’re not putting energy into what you say is important.
(via nofacednerd)
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2012 might as well of had people shitting in the streets and dying from the plague it was such a dark period in human history
this is lovely and all but at what point in my adult life was I meant to discover that wombats are fuckin massive??
livebloggingmydescentintomadness:
My man Jesus
What story is that?
Matthew 18:9
“And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away.”
“Jesus, how can I avoid sin when all these hussies keep revealing the fact that they have bodies?!”
“Hmmm, tough call bro. Have you tried gouging out your eyes so you don’t have to see all those bodies anymore?”
“wut”
“What?”
“Shouldn’t you tell them to… stop dressing like that or something?”
“Don’t see why. It’s not their fault that the fact that they have bodies makes you a fucking sinful horndog. Gotta fix that problem yourself, buddy. Go on, blind yourself.”
“Uh….”
“Or learn to keep it in your g’damn pants no matter what they’re wearing.”
He goes on for like several examples too.
“How can I avoid like, an accidental slip of the hand when…they’re dressin like that?”
“Cut it off.”
“wut”
“Cut it off. Your hand. If it’s a problem, stop having a hand.”
“wut”
“What”
“Did I fucking stutter?”
(via rosexknight)
star wars is so fucking stupid, I love it
Prime example of why being a fanfic writer is painful
star wars fuckery to english glossary: the reader’s digest version
- the star wars universe has no official name but in fandom you’ll see it shortened to GFFA for “galaxy far, far away”
- glass - transparisteel
- metal used in construction - durasteel
- very strong space-plastic (used in stormtrooper armor) - duraplast
- tablet computer (analogous to a PADD in trek) - datapad
- rather than paper, handwriting is usually done with a stylus on flimsiplast (flimsi/flimsy for short)
- holos are 3-d videos or videomessages, recorded and played on a holoprojector (these are often seen in small formats, palm-sized - analogous to like. a GoPro.)
- we don’t drive cars, we drive landspeeders or speeder bikes
- we don’t shoot guns, we shoot blasters
- if you didn’t bring a knife to a gun fight, you perhaps brought a vibroblade instead - an edged weapon that, you guessed it, vibrates. little ones could be called vibroshivs or vibroknives. we actually got to see polearm versions of these in The Mandalorian! it was very exciting.
- robots in GFFA are, of course, droids. astromech droids (astromechs) are the like. iphones of the droid world - ubiquitous, multipurpose, most with a similar aesthetic. R2-D2 and BB-8 are both astromech droids. human-shaped droids like C-3P0 are protocol droids.
- got a papercut? a nasty flesh wound? a missing chunk of your torso, perhaps? slap a bacta-patch on it or take a dip in a bacta tank for a soothing treatment with this all-purpose miracle healing goo. this is what diapered Luke is bobbing around in during the early part of Empire Strikes Back.
- you’re supposed to say kriff/kriffing instead of “damn,” “shit,” or “fuck/fucking,” but this is for cowards. let Obi-Wan cuss.
- midichlorians - ignore them.
- before the Empire comes to power, baby jedi who can’t hack it as knights or are never chosen to be Padawan apprentices become members of the Service Corps, the branches of which are the Agricultural Corps (AgriCorps), Medical Corps (MedCorps), Educational Corps (EduCorps), Exploration Corps (ExplorCorps)
- dates are expressed (typically) as [date] Before the Battle of Yavin (BBY) or [date] After the Battle of Yavin (ABY). for instance, the sequel trilogy begins in 34 ABY.
and, yes: that famous cantina tune from Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes is in a musical style called jizz. because star wars is incredibly stupid.
- popcorn is called bang-corn, because obviously the earth-centric aspect of popcorn is the popping, not the corn.
(via demilypyro)
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