if you call someone to witness and they refused to show up, you are legally entitled to stand outside their house and scream, but only every third day
you can sell your son into slavery once or twice, but after the third time he doesn’t have to put up with that shit anymore
no wailing allowed at funerals
also you can only have ONE funeral per person, don’t get greedy
if your neighbor’s tree has a branch hanging into your yard, you can legally cut down the entire fucking tree
however, if some of your neighbor’s fruit from his dumb tree falls into your yard, he can legally come into your yard to snoop around get it
if you call someone to witness and they’re too sick or old to get to court themselves, you have to provide a cart for them to come in, but it doesn’t have to be, like, a nice cart if you don’t want it to
the best thing about this is that each of these things must have happened at least once
(via )
Tumblr goes down in hellfire, millions lost, tumblr housing market crashes, Terminator bots rampant. Little did they know, one simple thing could fix it all:
