-After beating a giant rat to find a large cache of cheese-
Rogue: Cheese…that’s all? Paladin: Doesn’t sound like you’re having a gouda day. Ranger: I don’t see your problem, cheese is grate. Cleric: I don’t disabrie. DM: Rogue, make a will saving throw. Rogue: ….6. DM: You take 5 points of damage and have disadvantage on your will saving throws until you take a rest
my little brother and his friend are playing dungeons and dragons now and he told me that his character is a neutral evil half orc rogue named Nicholas (Flamel) Cage and that his friend is Mindfang. anyway i can’t describe what i’m feeling rn but it sure is good
“Thank you POTUS for putting parents in cages with their children instead of putting children in cages by themselves like you were fully willing to do previously”
I present to you, literally my favorite yelp review at the SmartPet I used to work at.
It’s called CLOSING for a reason people
The person who locked the doors in their faces is my hero.
one time when i was closing, the customer was taking too long to order and it turned closing time before he got the chance so we let him know that we wouldnt be taking his delivery. he got really pissed and w had to explain to him that we were now closed and suggested that he order earlier in the future.
a lot of TERFs speak like they’re giving a speech in a movie. One time one of them referred to me & my “brethren”, which they then had to clarify meant trans people and their supporters. I still think about that and laugh sometimes. “you and your brethren” fedgyejgfjhdgsjhksa like what are we, viking warriors?
