Mark the electrician has been here for five minutes and he’s already said “well that’s…weird” twice from the other room and frankly I’m afraid to ask.
It’s not good when skilled tradesman are standing in the middle of your room pinching the bridge if their nose, is it?
Mark just referred to the wiring in our bedroom as “creative” and “interesting”.
This is fine.
And now he’s taking apart the ceiling. I’m not worried, are any of you worried? I’m not, haha, it’s not like this house was previously owned by someone who would do something stupid like try to wire their house themselves…or store tins of varnish under the furnace behind a secret alcove…
Ha ha…
Ha.
Hm.
Fuck.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE’S NO NEUTRAL WIRES??!?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S GROUNDED INTO THE SCREWS HOLDING UP THE CEILING LIGHT???!?!!
Hot Take: Satan’s actual aim in “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” was to trick Johnny into committing the mortal sin of pride. Since he succeeded, the Devil gets his soul anyway. But enjoy your functionally useless golden fiddle for the next few decades, I guess.
Even hotter take: Johnny seems like the kind of cool and fun person who was going to go to hell for enjoying life to the fullest anyway, so all the Devil really achieved was a truly impressive self-own in the form of an immortal folk song commemorating Johnny absolutely destroying him in a fiddle duel, despite the fact that the Devil cheated by summoning an entire band of demons to back him up.
indie musicians are always singing about falling in love or getting ur heart broken like cant we talk about something else??? pinball??? talk about pinball??? lets talk about pinball??????
so apparently some idiots called the who stole my idea
you know what trope pisses me off the most? when the protag is pointing a gun at somebody and they’re like “you won’t do it. you’re too good” and the person holding the gun is like oh shit i am and they slowly lower the gun while the other person laughs. WHAT THE FUCK. if i were there, and somebody told me “you won’t do it” i would immediately shoot them dead without hesitating. who are you to tell me what i wont do. musty bitch
Keep in mind that there is almost always a third option, most especially when the person talking is vague about what, precisely, it is that you “won’t do.”
If it’s noodles, pour them on your sister instead of on her computer, or if the noodles are quite hot, pour them on her pillow or in a great spattering arc around her room.
If you have a supervillain at gunpoint and *they* say you’re “too good” and “won’t do it,” shoot them in the leg/foot or the shoulder. The former allows them to think they’re right while you lower the gun only to be confronted with sudden understanding and regret when you blow their metatarsals to kingdom come, while the latter is instant and avoids giving them even a moment’s satisfaction or any time to charge you while you’re lowering the gun to shoot them in the leg.
Door Number Three usually exists and is often your friend. Endeavor to cultivate awareness thereof.
my kink is fictional couples protecting each other not because one is ‘weaker’ (ie the female character) but because they’re both completely equal and their first instinct is to protect each other
EXCELLENT KINK, 10/10
Bonus points: when they’re both fighting over who gets to be the protective one.