Princess Peach was really just like “my castle is gonna be a weird museum with maybe some living quarters tucked away somewhere but mostly just magic portals to battlefields and slides” and everybody was like yeah you beautiful binch go ahead
There’s a whole fucking room in the castle that’s just a long corridor with a portrait of bowser at the end. There’s another specifically designed to be a trick of perspective so you run towards a portrait of a goomba that looks like it’s right in front of you but it’s actually far away and huge. There’s a room filled with paintings and then a mirror wall so you can like, see the paintings reflected, I guess?
Princess Peach just has a bizarre series of magical art installations and that’s her house
Like she LIVES there. That’s her HOUSE. She was like “hey toadsworth can we have a giant grandfather clock that if you jump at it it takes you to a magical world inside the clock but depending on what time you jump in the moving parts of the magic clock world will be faster or slower” and toadsworth was like “k lol” in her HOUSE
What I’m saying is Princess Peach is a fucking legend
“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos
classic texts have nothing on the crazy people come up with in modern times tbh
“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.”
– Joshua Graham, Who Is A Fallout New Vegas NPC, Something Most People Throwing This Quote Around Don’t Realize
“If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight like I always have.”
– Shadow the Hedgehog in what is widely considered one of if not the single worst game in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise
this is the source for this text and it haunts me on a regular basis
“look, it’s not like i hid anything, it just never came up!”
“You called yourself out for ‘straighsplaining’“
the whole bi thing goes completely over charles’ head and he keeps getting really aggro like “oh you and jake were real close huh?? too bad, sucker jake is MY best friend!”
everybody else is like “charles no”
at the end john mulaney turns out to be the embezzler they’ve been looking for
The only way Jake Overshare Peralta, Jake TMI Peralta, Jake Heart-On-His-Sleeve Peralta would fail to bring up the fact that he is bi, is if he himself were oblivious to the fact.
Come on @morthils this isn’t Gina Linetti we’re talking about. Stay in character.
The only way Jake would have had a high school boyfriend and not told Amy and Holt is if Jake himself did not realize that this dude was his boyfriend.
He would describe the relationship to Amy and she’d be like, “So you guys were dating” and he’d be like “It wasn’t like that that” and she’d be like:
:|
and Jake would be like, OH MY GOD. I HAD A BOYFRIEND IN HIGH SCHOOL. WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME THIS.
Lots of “practice kissing” was involved.
Jake’s mom is absolutely That Overly Supportive Parent with the bumper sticker and the flag who never actually like, talks to her son about it.
“I just thought she was really liberal!”
“Look, everyone has celebrity crushes! Like the entire cast of Infinity War. And some male models. And random good looking people on the street. And sometimes you’re handcuffing a guy with his hands in front and you lock eyes and your faces are close and you can smell his cologne and aftershave and ohhhh ok yup I see it now. Cool. Cool. Cool cool cool cool cool cool cool cool. Yeah, I’m definitely bi.”
Gina knew the entire time but didnt bring it up because she didnt want to mess them up
