As an atheist, putting my hand on the Bible and saying an oath before testifying to a court is less likely to get me to tell the truth than a pinkey promise
When my parents were fighting for custody, I was old enough to have a say, so they put me under oath to assure I was being honest with my feelings. Using my best serious face, knowing what was coming, when offered the bible to swear on, I requested to swear on the secretary’s hole punch, “because it’s far more honest. It says it’s going to punch a hole, and it does, best God I’ve seen today.” My mom buried her face in her hands, my dad sighed and rubbed his forehead. The judge almost choked on his water before telling the bailiff “find this young lady a hole punch!”
San Jose councilman
Lan Diep sworn into office with his Captain America Shield
I really hope folks start to understand this. we don’t participate in these elections because we feel like it’s a legitimate “duty”, we do it because black women are literally one of the most oppressed groups of people in the WORLD and we only have ourselves to fend for.
my favorite scp is the joke scp that makes everything it comes into contact with unnecessarily verbose because one of the reported incidents was a copy of atlas shrugged that, before infection, was a sticky note that said “I HATE POOR PEOPLE”
you ever think about the fact that in the wreck it ralph universe ten years off from the movie theres probably someone posting on a forum like “does ANYONE remember the character king candy from the game sugar rush????? my local arcade used to have him but one day he stopped showing up in the roster and none of my friends remember him from their versions”
someone datamines an old sugar rush console and finds nothing about king candy and everyone who frequented litwaks is deeply perturbed by their collective memory
the entire concept of ‘going turbo’ makes basically every video game creepypasta true
Forum goers respond with “No King, just Princess Vanellope”, and the Litwaks goers are just “But Vanellope was the girl in a hoodie, with the teleport?”
And that’s just like, one of the hundreds/thousands of other sketchy things the site has going on in the background by just sitting on any of its web pages without an adblocker/scriptblocker
