Cowboy got them sturdy denim jeans (jeans) Boots with the spurrs (the spurrs) He keep an eye out lookin at the herd yeehaw the horse (yeehaw the horse) and then of course Cowboy said woah woah woah woah woah woah woah
no smart appliances in this house. absolute fucking moron appliances only. my toaster is there to make bread hot not to tweet what time I ate breakfast or whatever the fuck
don’t need my goddamn microwave to snitch to the nsa
if i am somehow forced to own a smart appliance (likely due to lack of availability) i will figure out how to take the computer out and make it dumb
chris fleming is funny because he looks like someone forced a jc penney mannequin to watch sex and the city 57 times in a row and left it on the front doorstep of a gay bar, but you listen to him talk and recount his experiences and he sounds like arthur dent discovering that he’s bi at 31, like i could hit chris fleming with a sledgehammer and he’d get up and be like “well what the fuck is this, a home depot?”
hey so were y'all gonna tell me chris fleming had a tumblr or was i just supposed to find that out that he reblogged this after waking up from a 5 hour nap like some sort of groggy soon-to-be-hired on the spot court jester
Several people have pointed out that in many countries outside the U.S., dates are written day/month rather than month/day, which would make Meat Day actually September 2nd. To which I would like to say:
1. In Japan it’s month/day, so February 9th would technically be the correct date 2. That being said… two Meat Days
