my friend has one of those really deep wells (like 4 ft deep!) outside of her bedroom window bc her room’s in the basement so any time it rains a bunch of frogs end up trapped down there and I climb down to get them out.
and after a while I noticed that some animal (probably a raccoon) takes its food down there to eat for whatever reason, so there are a bunch of skulls and bones. I have special permission to collect skulls for educational purposes and deliver them to certain people, so now I grab those too.
Well today I climbed down in, found three frogs, and five skulls. So I’m climbing out of this pit with a frog and a ziploc bag full of animal bones and suddenly the fattest pug and boston terrier I’ve ever seen both come over barking
and the neighbor comes over to see what’s going on. and I have these bones and these frogs and I’m like “uh, hey!”
just got my. bag of skulls.
and she says “oh! they told me about you, hahaha! are the frogs okay?”
I’m glad this is my legacy.
it’s worth noting I have to like, put my arms on either side of the well and use my upper body to lower myself into it and then I like duck down and disappear so it HAS to look weird from a distance, no matter HOW many skulls or frogs I come out with.
Truth Coming Out of Her Well to Shame Mankind
you should record yourself coming out of the well onto a crappy vhs tape. but it would bea bit short so you should pad the video out with other cool stuff like the skulls and frogs. maybe some other wildlife too like bugs and deer. maybe an empty chair and someone brushing their hair to make it a performance art piece.
my plan is to jog in a zip code where the average house is $1 million dollars. i jog everyday. i run into the trophy wives jogging club. we jog past each other so often, they’re forced to interact with me. we’re friends now. i’m invited places. i meet other millionaires, men who love me. i marry the richest, using an alias. throughout the first year of marriage, i’m moving assets and cash to an off shore bank account. i fake my own death on our anniversary. he’s heartbroken.
i started jogging in a new million dollar neighborhood. i’ve just made friends with the local jogging crew headed by ashtonlynn and brotyna “chichi” who has a single millionaire brother,
Is there any version of this plan where I don’t have to jog
u only have to jog past the ladies which is like 46 seconds. suck it up for the fraud of it all
the fact that the Eric Andre Show was purposefully made to mirror the decor and surreality of the Black Lodge from Twin Peaks tells us that Eric and Hannibal are multi-dimensional beings of immense power, living in their own pocket dimension.
it makes even more sense because those who live in the Black Lodge, even if neutral or helpful, feed off of human suffering. Eric and Hannibal bring people onto their show for “interviews” and proceed to confuse and terrorize them, fueling Eric and Hannibal and making them more powerful.
“But if you think carrying around a flame-thrower is ridiculous, consider this: how ridiculous is it that men’s behavior has made wielding fire as a weapon a preferable alternative?”
Excellent question, Men’s Health. We appreciate you being the ones to ask it.
