Ageing slows the greater your impact on history. Washington, Churchill, and Lincoln live well into their 200s, while figures such as Julius Caesar live for close to a thousand years. It is your 5000th birthday, and you look as young as you did on your 21st.
I walk outside and to a massive crowd cheering me on. “Happy 5000th to the creator of Meet n’ Fuck games” reads a giant banner.
a 30,000 year old minecraft youtuber hurls a javelin through your chest
Humanity has been extinct for millenia, but their impact is known across the universe. Their cities, landmarks, and statues strewn across nearly every planet in nearly every galaxy. The next to follow their footsteps do so with religious ferver, recording in exact detail the first before them. Almost half of their technology stems from learned human history. Their reverence for humanity’s history and knowledge leads them to pursue every last ounce. Finally, in a quiet planet in the middle of the universe, they find the last remnant of humanity, not lost to the abyss of time. Shockingly, he still lives. A tepid explorer walks forward, approaching what he belives is a god before him, and with a shaky grasp of English, greets themself.
The human does as well, then offers the group a deal on a remaster of “Skyrim”
fun fact: any policy on drugs that isn’t harm reduction is going to cause addicts to suffer and die
fun fact: Drug addiction is a public health issue, and approaching it as if it were a law enforcement issue is prejudicial to addicts and will result in their suffering and death
