[karkat voice] you know it’s actually pretty convenient that your species is also nocturnal since if it weren’t the conflicting sleep schedules would get irritating real fast.
[rose voice] what? oh, no, humans are diurnal. dave and i are just disasters.
Date a girl who crawled out of a TV intending to kill you but ended up crawling into a candlelit dinner you started preparing for seven days in advance and was so astonished she gave it a try and now you’re married.
i just saw a post on fb that said men shouldn’t let their girlfriends/wives pump gas….like literally men should be the only ones putting gas in the car….what is the logic someone explain
well u see, once a woman has a taste of control of phallic “pumping” & ejaculation of gasoline into the warm and receptive car body, she will carry this energy forth as an emasculatory force against the man in question, stripping his life of meaning, since fucking the car is usually his prerogative and his main source of identity
