Silver Tongue

Mar 27

jaclcfrost:

jaclcfrost:

good responses to being stabbed with a sword (part 2)

• oh no i’m allergic
  
• it sword of seems like you’ve got a problem with me
• laughter. not the word “laughter”, just. laughing
• sure it’s the thought that counts and i appreciate the sentiment but does this gift come with a receipt
• you wound me. literally. you just. actually wounded me. that thing is really sharp. so you. don’t even look at me like that they can’t all be winners
• wouldn’t it have been hilarious if i just flew back like balloons do when you pop ‘em? can you even imagine? god. just. do it again, pretend the first time didn’t happen. come on. please

honorable mentions

• grabbing the sword by the blade, pulling it out, handing it back to them and saying “you dropped this”
  
• that’s unfortunate
• it could be worse
• this isn’t really how i pictured my day going when i woke up this morning, but who am i to complain

(Source: greelin, via comfiecore)

celestial-sytry:

*reposts thing to Tumblr*

(via )

superior-grandtheftauto-tune:

superior-grandtheftauto-tune:

That time Samurai Jack almost fucked the dull shit out of Aku.

(Source: grandtheft-autotune, via )

pax-britannica:

writing-prompt-s:

Tired of being mocked, hundreds of village idiots band together to make their own village.

(via )

“Who wants omelets?”

yourplayersaidwhat:

Our druid just received this unknown magical egg from a street salesman.

Druid: “How long til it hatches??”

DM: “Roll to find out”

Druid: *Rolls a 1*

DM: “You got too excited and crushed the egg”

Druid to our party: “WHO WANTS OMELETS?!”

(via yourplayersaidwhat)

Todd Howard noclips into your house and releases Skyrim HD, killing you instantly.

(Source: hachikosyndrome, via )

orestian:

eggcup:

nflstreet:

what a cuck

>be presidential adviser
>order fellow conservatives to vote for trumpcare
>they all just fucking laugh at me
>tfw

>tfw the coup is not as easy as u thought it wud be >pls no bully

(via )

puublack:

peoplegettingreallymadatfood:

I am now one of the people getting really mad at food what the fuck is this

(via gearholder)

[video]

konosuba

chefpyro:

samwritesstuff:

chefpyro:

chefpyro:

four idiots accidentally and purposely torture one another for 20 episodes

i mean

yeah

It’s Always Sunny in DnD

you know what, that’s it. that’s what it is. you got it.

it’s an Always Sunny fantasy au.

(via )