(via demilypyro)
i always know when a fic writer has never experienced a hickey
How? It’s not like you’ve experienced one either.
“[Character A] licked and nibbled [Character B]’s collarbone, leaving dark purple spots along the way.”
either they’re tossing away the meaning of “nibbled” for the advancement of smut or they have a solid misunderstanding of hickeys. it takes like four or five straight seconds of hard suction to make a spot “dark purple”.
okay so two options here:
“[Character A] licked and nibbled [Character B]’s collarbone, leaving faint pink spots along the way.”
OR (and this one is better imo)
“[character A] sucked on the skin of [character B]’s collarbone harder than a vacuum on high power, leaving behind appropriately dark purple hickeys”
“[Character A] puckered their lips and absolutely Hoover™’d the life out of [Character B]’s entire neck. ‘You DirtDevil™’ [Character B] said with a breathy sigh.”
(via bloodsbane)
[video]
[video]
(via wuffleton)
[video]
Could Alfred be less savage for once
No. He’s perfect this way.
(via pembrokewkorgi)
If that doesn’t say ‘suck my dick, Nazis’. I don’t know what does
Over 113, now! He missed celebrating his Bar Mitzvah because of the first World War, so he finally observed it September 2016, a hundred years later.
Just checked, and he’s still alive! He’ll be 114 on September 15th.
(via deep-sea-prince)
[video]
[video]
