Silver Tongue

beetrootbot:

A scrimblo and her bimbinis,,,

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facelessoldgargoyle:

Those of you who liked the knife cleaning video will also like this!

Cleaning old tools: now, with no terrible sounds!

the-last-punbender:

not-really-a-blogger:

Here’s my plan for my New Horizons town

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“Animal crossing,” you say?

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captain-snark:

bigprettygothgf:

my-wanton-self:

nowscience:

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There are A LOT of crabs on Christmas Island, man.

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They used to cross the road, probably, no definitely, without looking left and right. And they got squished.

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Environmentalists had a hell of a job, keeping them in their lane. Traffic would have to be blocked for the duration.

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But now, they have a lovely bridge, and no one has to ask: Why did the Christmas Island Crab cross the road, if they’re just gonna get squished?

Answer: They want to hit the beach. Because that’s where they like to have sex. And because the mummy crabs like to throw their eggs into the ocean after they’ve spawned them in the burrows that the daddy crab so kindly digs on the beach.

Look at them scurrying over their bridge, the smell of the ocean in their noses, the thought of copulation driving them on…

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Whew! Finally, made it to the beach…now The Sex can begin!

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Mission accomplished… And a few weeks later after a float in the ocean…

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Back come the ankle biters…to the rainforest where they live.

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i don’t think i’ve ever heard “for sex” as the answer to any “why did it cross the road” joke

draayder:

draayder:

spitblaze:

if someone tells you they play Yakuza for anything other than the stupendous water physics they’re probably lying

I just started yakuza kenzan and was already floored by this, the literal first moments of the game featuring the most photo-realistic puddle I’ve ever seen

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this game came out in 2008

this is not water physics but yakuza 7 decided it wanted to innovate bread physics too

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and the team kind of going hog on little things like that gets talked about a little here

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Yokoyama just writes “and then Ichiban eats some bread” and the entire animation and modelling team just goes oh yeah? oh yeah??? oh he’ll eat some fucking bread alright 

neonlemonz:
“silentlaughter992:
“” ”
abby-howard:
“School 4 PETZ
In this universe snakes grow little paws
You may think this is a “lizard” but no. It is a snake, with paws
”

abby-howard:

School 4 PETZ

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In this universe snakes grow little paws

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You may think this is a “lizard” but no. It is a snake, with paws

cinnamon-ginger:

friendly-neighborhood-disaster:

logo-comics:

powersandplanetaries:

error-404-fuck-not-found:

gallifreyanwriter:

Hey, you know that one character? The one played by the tall, long-haired actor? The one who was pre-law in 2005, and well on his way to going to law school and getting a degree until an unexpected family issue reared its head, and he dropped out and chose a different career path? Y’know, he’s got that complicated relationship with his father, a parent-child relationship with his only sibling, and has some strange, destructive abilities that tie in with multiple traumatic experiences with fire?

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op is right and the timelines do match up. what if they were in the same classes

Do you think their classmates were ever like “Sam Winchester… is he the one who dropped out to get custody of his little sister with the YouTube channel?” “No, he was the one who ended up faking his death and becoming a multi-state serial killer with his brother.” “He WHAT?”

Everyone would have guessed it to be the other way around.

Spencer could have prevented the apocalypse, but Sam definitely could not have raised Carly

This is the only take that matters