Several
years ago, I worked as a director for an art gallery/broker. We had a number of
people come in with different artwork looking for appraisals. Some turned out
to be fairly valuable, most did not. This is one of those times.
Client:
I have a painting and I would like to find out how
much it is worth.
Me: No problem, I can definitely help you with that.
The
client hands me the “painting” and I immediately recognize it as a cheap print
of a semi-famous artist.
Me: I’m sorry to tell you this, but this isn’t actually a painting, it’s
a print. And, because it isn’t signed or a limited edition, it isn’t really
valuable.
Client:
How do you know?
I was
a little miffed that I had to explain that I was experience and knew what I was
talking about, but hoping that they simply wanted to be educated.
Me: First, there is no texture from the paint. Second, it is on
cardboard which no painter would ever do because it isn’t a quality substrate.
But, most of all, (I hold up a magnifying glass to the print) do you see those
dots?
Client:
Yes.
Me: Those dots are created from the printing process.
Client:
I don’t believe you. This has been in my family for
a long time and I know it’s worth a lot of money!
Me: Well, I’ve given you the facts. If you think I’m wrong, feel free to
take it somewhere else to get it appraised.
Client:
I will because you are ridiculous and obviously
don’t know what you’re talking about!
They
left, refusing to believe that their “painting” was no more than a cheap print
that you could buy at a garage sale for a buck.
bruce wayne maintains a presence on all conspiracy theory boards with the screen name BruceWayneIsTheBatman and all his posts have titles like “BRUCE WAINE IS BAT-MAN INDISPUTABLE PROOF” and it’s just a picture of Bruce Wayne from the back next to a picture of Batman from behind and they both have the contours of their butt drawn on in a shitty MSPaint red line (note: Bruce is in a suit and Batman has a cape, neither of their butts are clearly discernible) and the quote “THE BUTTS MATCH!!! THE FACTS DON’T LIE!!!!!” and he makes at least three of these posts a day, and “Bruce Wayne is the Batman” becomes a meme a la “Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer” and he gets asked about it on a talk show and he laughs uproariously at the idea and Stephen Colbert just HAPPENS to have a batman mask under the desk and they do a bit together where Bruce Wayne puts on the mask and walks around saying things like “excuse me, bank robbers, can I perhaps offer you some money to stop you robbing this bank?” and “I say, cease and desist your criminal behavior or I’ll have my butler ask you to leave” and the audience is LOSING THEIR MINDS laughing at the idea of this pampered rich guy taking on the Joker on a bi-weekly basis and then anyone who suggests “Bruce Wayne is Batman” in earnest gets met with mocking “oh man do the butts match” comments
callout post to my storyboard prof for calling caterpillars ugly in her book
That alien and caterpillar = cutest things I’ve seen today Those big eyed mammals? = I wouldn’t trust ‘em for a SECOND
This is so rude.
this reminds me of when my animation teacher started talking about ‘inherently female’ face-construction and he;s mostly a cool dude but i stg I was just screaming silently starin’ at him
Can whichever @badcharacterdesign mod originally posted this tell this professor that the bug on the right is the cutest and most personality-filled thing in that diagram and that they should feel bad for calling it ugly?
And, I wonder how much of this professor’s sort of bad/wrong thinking is pervasive enough in the industry to be why so many character designs end up so much blandern when finalized by higher-ups or taken through several series iterations…
“
And, I wonder how much of this professor’s sort of bad/wrong thinking is pervasive enough in the industry ”
Extremely. Animation and design school is absolutely polluted with a “MORE HUMAN = MORE CUTE” mentality and it is exactly how we end up with many of the most abhorrent nightmares showcased by badcharacterdesign. There were even people at Pixar who tried to give Wall-E a mouth and a nose because that’s how they were taught.
This issue even spills out of the animation/art world and into robotics. The reason someone even coined the concept of the “uncanny valley” is because the people designing androids were often under the same clueless “MAKE IT MORE HUMAN” thinking and had to be told with a psychological study and a diagram that, no, making it more human is actually really creepy and people actually identify very well with totally nonhuman faces.
OK, but I partially disagree with this headcanon, and here’s why:
1) Bruce is totally playing Gamora. You don’t think Bruce Banner has played Dungeons & Dragons before? Bruce Banner has absolutely played Dungeons & Dragons before. He played all through high school and college and when Bucky announces the campaign Bruce jumps at the opportunity because he just misses it so much (mostly rose-tinted nostalgia goggles but). So he sits Bucky down and asks him for every bit of info he can on the setting and spends a whole night with a pot of tea drafting up the five-page backstory for his space assassin and her family tree and her struggle with her relationship with the villain and comes to Bucky with a fully-ready character sheet and a list of things Bucky will need to OK before Gamora hops in.
Bucky quietly resolves to integrate as much as he can into the story, mainly because Bruce came up with some better ideas than he’d had.
2) Tony is definitely playing Quill, because Tony has never played D&D before. You don’t get to be where Tony Stark is in life and have much free time. He does what a lot of newbies do and bases a character on himself, or at least the parts he likes: clever, snarky, pre-’90s musical taste, beds space babes, heroic sometimes probably. He wants to be cool but has no idea how to be cool within this context (“My character’s name is Starlord.” “What? Tony, no.”). He hogs the spotlight all the time (all the time) but clearly has no idea what he’s doing and when someone who seems like they know what they’re talking about gives him advice he always takes (“I’m going to need that guy’s leg.” “Seriously? Alright” *Rolls to grapple*).
Quill’s backstory is primarily Bruce’s doing. Tony just handed it in with a “yeah whatever’s on there.”
3) Thor is playing Drax but didn’t join until a few sessions in when he tagged along and decided it looked like fun (“THIS PLEASES ME! ALLOW ME TO JOIN YOUR TALES OF ADVENTURE!”). He definitely needed help constructing his character sheet, but he had no problem coming up with a character. Bucky asked him what he wanted to play and got that glint in his eye and responded “I WILL FORGE A HERO WORTHY OF THE ANCIENT TALES OF ASGARD.” And he put a lot of thought into Drax, both in personal history and personality. He’s mostly modeled on Thor’s favorite Asgardian folk heroes, with some personal flaws and quirks thrown in that Thor thinks are interesting.
Of course Thor doesn’t really understand the game part of it, he’s in it for the story (“Thor what the hell man there’s no way we can take on Ronan at this level!” “AH BUT THINK OF THE THRILLING DRAMA OF THE MOMENT DRAX AND RONAN MEET AGAIN!” “We are all going to die.” “AND IT WILL BE A THRILLING TRAGEDY!”)
4) Steve is absolutely playing Rocket but what started as a complete joke ballooned into a fully fleshed-out character with a tragic backstory. Steve’s an artist, he’s a creative guy and little too creative for his own good sometimes and bouncing his ideas off of Natasha turned a simple joke into a more elaborate character dynamic than even Bruce’s. He trolls Bucky a lot and it’s even better for Steve when he really gets into Rocket’s character and plays up the drama, partly because Bucky can’t tell if he’s joking or not.
5) Somewhere in the brainstorming session, Steve and Natasha decided that Rocket has a partner who is a talking tree. Natasha pitches this idea completely straight-faced to Bucky and after the fiasco of Steve’s character idea Bucky’s just too tired to say no to the tree-man. Natasha gives him a bit of a backstory and how Rocket and Groot got together and it sounds pretty solid, so whatever, tree-man can stay.
Then when all the characters get introduced Natasha just hovers over Tony and puffs out her chest and says in her deepest voice: “I am Groot.”
And Steve snickers and nobody has any idea why.
A session later Natasha is responding to everything Tony says with that same deep “I am Groot.” and Steve goes blue in the face trying to hold in his laughter and Tony cracks and the game has to pause for 10 minutes while Nat and Steve recompose themselves.
Nat also has a better grasp of the rules than Bucky realized and completely tweaked her character into being able to do basically anything she can justify. And it’s all right there in the book, Bucky can’t even argue from a rules standpoint. They’re only level 5 Groot shouldn’t be essentially bulletproof but through some loophole in the rules, yep, there it is.
Natasha Romanoff is trained to exploit weaknesses. Of course she’s a total munchkin.
jesus christ imagine the THX logo coming up but instead of the weird “bwee-oon” it’s the “No” from hotel mario stretched out and played at the biggest volume possible
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
