lolodapsycho:

this-isnt-my-bra:

Once my friend Henry was accused of wearing wireless headphones by a substitute so she said for him to hand them over so he took them off and handed them to her. Then later on she asked him a question and he didn’t respond so she said it louder and he still didn’t respond. She asked why he was not responding and he said “I can’t understand you ma'am, you took my hearing aids.”

HOLY SHIT

terriamon:

gwynndolin:

terriamon:

pineapple on pizza discourse is so ugly like no one can win.

we’re all losers as long as we live in the reality where its commonplace to put fruit on pizza 

tomato a fruit

blocked

duraraross:
“ What the fuck is the leader of team instinct doing in my harvest moon town
”
everybody has to start somewhere

duraraross:

What the fuck is the leader of team instinct doing in my harvest moon town

everybody has to start somewhere

boychic:

remember when the poison status was intense as fuck and you had to rush your poisoned pokemon to a pokemon center and the game would make that awful fucking noise that made you feel bad for allowing such a thing to happen to your pokemon

exclusionaryhomosexual:

unassumingvenusaur:

…………………………….

so apparently any post with a tag with the word “lesbian” in it is now automatically considered nsfw by this site 

if you search “lesbian” with safe search on nothing comes up

if you search it with safe search off you get porn gifs and the like for straight dudes

homophobia is fun kids 

lesbian is not a hetero porn category

lushthemagicdragon:

ladykaty:

zombb-8:

crystallizedtwilight:

nanyoky:

I want to write an alternative version of Romeo and Juliet where instead of being a little ponce and trying to work things out for himself, Romeo asks his smarter friends what to do about the whole thing and Benvolio and Mercutio come up with the world’s greatest plan:

Marriage of convenience between Juliet and Mercutio.

Think about it.

Juliet’s parents want her to marry into the Prince’s family. Mercutio is a good compromise between no marriage and Paris.

Mercutio probably won’t get his inheritance if he keeps being HELLA FUCKING GAY ALL OVER THE PLACE so a beard is only a benefit to him.

They would probably get along great rolling their eyes at how adorably stupid Romeo is.

Romeo and Benvolio could get a “bachelor pad” right next to Juliet and Mercutio’s house. Every night, Romeo and Mercutio high five as they hop the fence to go bang their one true love.

The second half of the play is just all of them trying to keep up the charade and being “THIS CLOSE” to getting caught all the time. But everything ends nicely because true love conquers all.

Everybody wins. Nobody dies.

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THE SHAKESPERE AU I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED

DUDE DID YOU JUST FIX ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC PLAYS EVER CREATED?!

ONCE AGAIN EVERYTHING IS SOLVED BY THE QUEER LENS.

221bitssmallerontheoutside:

textsbetweengems:

Yes 🔪 of 🔪 course 🔪 a 🔪🔪🔪race🔪🔪🔪

THIS IS SO PEARL

watercolourstorm:
“ disappointing
”
@talk-to-a-jelly

apscores:

straightwhiteboystexting:

emisonislifeok

is he having a stroke what the fuck

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renaissavce:

roumanian:

english: coconut oil

french: :)

english: oh boy

french: oil of the nut of the coco

IM CRYINGNFN