I was working as a freelance contractor, fixing up care homes for a while. It was a cash-in-hand sort of job and people always wanted to get away as cheap as they could. One particular job took the cake!
Me: A job of this magnitude will cost you about £XXXX.
Client: I’ve worked construction my whole life. I know this won’t cost more than £300 in materials. What do you want for just the labor? I’ll pay the materials!
Me: I want £XXXX [a third of my original quote] for labor, but unless you have the same kind of contacts I do, you won’t get away cheaper if you buy materials yourself.
Client: Nonsense. I’ll pay you £XXXX (£400 under my lowest quote). I bet I won’t even spend £300!
Me: Ok, but I want £200 deposit.
Client: I don’t have more than £200 on me right now. You’ll have to wait until Monday for the deposit. Use these 200 today for materials!
I had traveled across the country for this job and already spent £50 on travel just for the quote, so I begrudgingly accepted what I thought was a 4 day job, starting over the weekend and ending on the Tuesday.
Monday comes, and the client takes me to buy more materials.
Me: What about that deposit? I really need that money now.
Client: Well, this cost more than I thought. I don’t have that much cash on me, it all went to materials.
At this point we had spent more than £1000 on materials, and weren’t even halfway there. Because the client insisted on only bringing £1000 at a time, we could only get so much materials each day, and had to work on a day-to-day basis with what we got. At the end, we spent 8 days working that job, because the materials kept trickling in, instead of getting it all at once. I finish up and head home, leaving an invoice on the client’s desk along with all receipts. A week later I call to see why I hadn’t gotten paid yet (and this includes the deposit).
Client: Well, you took twice as long as you said you would and the materials cost more than 10 times what we agreed on, so I’m not going to pay you.
This is why I’m no longer working as a freelance contractor!
once upon a time young young teenage me used to write fan fiction like my life depended on it, new fics every week and I had no idea there was someone out there printing out my fics and putting them in a box to read when they needed something to cheer them up
anyways fast forward to 20 year old me on my third date with Emily and she mentions offhand that she’s got this box of fic she printed out and saved
it’s a few months later after that and she shows me one of the fics in the box and holy shit that’s my garbage fic from so long ago
anyways my point is life is a fucking trip my dude
i still remember when we found this out. i don’t think either of us stopped yelling for hours
look it’s been eight years and I’m still like LMAO I MARRIED A FAN
This is the cutest thing I’ve ever read in my whole life
imagine your OTP
All overwatch discourse is cancelled blizzard doesn’t even know what their own fucking story is so all of us trying to determine which characters are Problematic are playing a fools game. no gods no masters here boys
torbjorn fucked my wife
my apologies. I’m writing up the callout post for all torbjorn apologists as we speak
what no i never said it was a bad thing
Game idea: You play as a humble peasant who must fight off waves of adventurers who feel entitled to just waltz into your house and loot whatever they please.
LET GO OF MY CHEESE WHEEL YOU JERKFACE
Humble Peasant kills adventurers that enter their home
Humble Peasant keeps their weapons, magic items, and hold
Humble Peasant realizes that stronger and stronger adventurers are coming to claim their growing pile of loot
Humble Peasant builds traps and fortifications to keep them out
Humble Peasant procures exotic pets to help defend their home
Humble Peasant continues to amass more and more loot and attract stronger and stronger adventurers
Humble Peasant has to keep building up and fortifying their home, traps, and pets to keep the adventurers out
Humble Peasant suddenly realizes that they have accidentally built a dungeon. It’s a fucking dungeon now. It’s fortified and full of traps, monsters, and treasure, and the Humble Peasant is the boss.
Humble Peasant realizes that adventurers will never leave them alone now.
Humble Peasant hates adventurers.
Humble Peasant accidentally becomes major villain.


