me in 1346 on a medieval battlefield, being shot by an early use of firearms in europe: damn this is really gonna change the meta
the halberd-wielding peasant standing next to me: what the fuck are you talking about
i fucking hate australia i got up at 4am this morning, christmas morning, to go to the bathroom and a giant ass fucking spider is just sitting behind the door like hello and i looked at it and like the first thought that occurred to me was “you’re not santa”
Mom is forcing the family to play D&D on our holiday. Dad has decided to play a dwarf rogue named Thunderfuk.
Little Sister is now asking what kind of weapon Santa would use
Ofc he’d use a mace! Its all the swinging action of his sack but it packs a bigger punch!
Consensus seems to be he is bludgeoning people with a sack of presents with the stats of a +1 mace :’D it’s enchanted with the magic of Christmas
Naughty children get 1d6+1 bludgeoning damage
