I met a girl walking down the street, singing

talk-to-a-jelly:

image

WHO’S EDGY STRAWBERRY SCENTED CHILD IS THIS

THEY KEEP PUNCHING MY SHOP, COME GET YOUR CHILD

rosexxxknight:

cheshireinthemiddle:

it-goes-both-ways:

intrepid-hallucinations:

hooks-and-chains:

avianawareness:

asgardandbeyond:

giraffepoliceforce:

altering-cave:

So I don’t think those free condoms universities hand out suck as much as guys say they do.

Okay, but seriously. If you’re ever considering sexy times with a guy and he tells you that he can’t wear a condom there is a 100.3% chance that he is a liar, and you should definitely not have sex with him. Don’t have sex with liars. Have sex with a cute honest people that bring you ice cream the next morning. Liars do not bring you ice cream. And if they do it’s ice cream made of lies. Ice cream made of lies is very emotionally unfulfilling. Don’t trust liars or their disease-ridden ice cream.

that was the best safe-sex talk ever.

Why I am suspicious of those who say they got pregnant because a condom “broke”… 

HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER USED A CONDOM. HAVE ANY OF YOU HAD SEX YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT CONDOMS. SHUT THE FUCK UP. I’m sick of this shit. Just because a condom has a tensile force high enough to withstand inflation does not mean it can comfortably fit any penis. No one wants latex literally stretched against a boner like it is in this pic. A condom that is too small causes added friction which can lead to the condom tearing. If someone tells you it is too small, you LISTEN. YOU DO NOT HAVE RAW SEX WITH THEM. THAT IS NOT WHAT I AM SAYING. YOU GO BUY A MAGNUM. There are even sizes above that. SO NO THERE IS NO EXCUSE TO SAY THAT A PERSON CANNOT WEAR ANY CONDOMS BUT THERE ARE PLENTY OF PEOPLE WHO DO NOT FIT IN CERTAIN SIZES. And whoever the fuck said they don’t believe condoms break is literally fucking stupid as hell. You didn’t even try to think you slut shaming ignorant ass. Condoms do not break from things not fitting in them. They break due to frictional forces without sufficient lubricant and air bubbles trapped in the reservoir tip that push through the latex upon ejaculation. Proper application requires that the tip be pinched to remove this air while it is rolled down the shaft. Very few people know this due to the rampant lack of appropriate sex ed. Proper condom application technique and education is crucial to effective birth control and STI protection. So before you go spouting your ignorant crap, how bout you think about your penised partner and the overall function of a condom and try to spread real education rather than shaming people.

Thank you for articulating what most cannot even comprehend. <3

Also if it’s really tight it can block the blood supply and can be very painful and even damaging.

Let’s be honest, a majority of the reblogs are for the first few comments and from people who have never worn a condom.

I’m reblogging here to save a life. As a person who has a partner with a larger penis I can confirm that condoms get REALLY uncomfortable for him, even the Magnums. Yes, there are sizes above that but they are not readily available in most places. Now, that’s not to say that if I tell him to wear one he won’t, but I can 100% confirm that people with larger dicks (or smaller dicks idk) totally have a harder time with condoms. The stupid thing has left marks on him before.

Girls, if you want a comparison here’s the only one I can think of: It’s like wearing a bra. Exceot the bra is made of latex and is a size or so too small. And you gotta wear it when you’re horny. It sucks.

But, like, holy shit have safe sex like seriously. But don’t be a fukkin bitch if the dude tells you that he has a hard time with condoms. Don’t sleep with him if he’s a freaking dick anyway, and above all - EDUCATE YOURSELVES!!

dixsilence:

th4nkyoub3n:

monkeysky:

cottonkun:

Yeah but did you guys notice that YOU CAN SEE THE TRAINERS IN THE BATTLES NOW

Hyper Beam the other trainer to win in one move

you don’t even need pokemon you can knock out the bird with your hands

image

You die in the game you die for REAL

rotten-pastel-boy:

star-the-blind-inkling:

thebuffsquidmom:

swissytheinkling:

princeofdoomrps:

fawntrolls:

last-honest-pizza:

rxtonhnhaketon:

urban-eagle:

rxtonhnhaketon:

brotherhoot:

What is your Assassin name?

MINE IS “NOVICE NOVICE”

H O W

W H Y ? ??

You are now the Moon Moon of this fandom

will i never escape the memes

IM EYE EAGLE 

WHY LOL

Night turkey

Moon Killer

Sun Night
(Okay, this is embarrassing.)

Bloody Killer? Bit on the nose, hm?

((um…hidden light? Is this supposed to be cheesy?))

Fallen Dagger…. Oh wow i’m an accident waiting to happen once again..! :”D!!!

Bloody Saber
That’s pretty rad

mr-zuipperpips:
“ HOLY SHIT
”

mr-zuipperpips:

HOLY SHIT

Another trope I like is when the lore comes from an unconventional and frankly unreliable source like learning how to kill a ghost from a loser who read it in a comic once.

yinx:

read a girl who dates books

Book a girl who reads dates