pembrokewkorgi:

uOH MY GOSH! IT’S SO CUTE!  Thanks, Spurs!

inkerton-kun:

kingkaor:

When you’re looking at porn and someone walks in so you tab out but the other tab also has porn
Add a pic for me I’m on mobile

its-a-different-world:

thegreenwolf:

newwavenova:

waspabi:

lornacrowley:

blossomfae:

missvoltairine:

bradkey:

osmanthusoolong:

arminarlerted:

story time: i taught my little cousin her first longer word when she was very young. i taught her to say “tax benefits”. and to this day my aunt still doesn’t know where she got it from, but it was a hilarious sight to see a little toddler waddling around the house, wearing a big diaper, all the while yelling “TAX BENEFITS!!!!”

My parents did this with me and “nuclear disarmament”.

I taught my little brother to say “micro-surgical vasectomy reversal” (saw it on a billboard) on a road trip, and he didn’t stop saying it for literal years.

My parents taught me to chant “Get your laws off our bodies!” for a pro-choice rally when I was like four and I went to preschool and taught all the other kids the chant and led them on a mini-parade around the playground and the teachers were like ?????????? ?????????? ????????????

whenever my brother threw a tantrum as a baby my parents would chant “live free or die” until he calmed down it was fuckin weird

when i was a kid whenever we got stuck in traffic my dad would say “what the fuck?!?” in a very comic voice and i would repeat it and then he would say it with a slightly different inflection and i would repeat that too and so forth and so basically my poor mother would be stuck in standstill traffic listening to her husband and 4 yr old daughter swearing at each other without end

i’m a preschool teacher and we like to joke around using radical vocabulary with the children, the other day i overheard one kid say ‘this is my truck’ and the other one said ‘no, this truck belongs to the collective’; they all say it now

That last one.

This is too good not to reblog.

help

projectendo:

She lost her child.

quartz-poker:

S’like Batman. Preptime = victory.

okay, batman vs kevin. Both get 3 hours of preptime

deyogee:

NO FUCK OFF DON’T DO THIS 2 ME HOW DARE YOU???

quartz-poker:

miketooch:

samandriel:

amandakaskey:

beingapotterheadisawesome:

I don’t know if I should cry or cry

maybe cry

have you tried crying

Little Harry’s face is like “I don’t know if this is going to be as fun and whimsical as it seems…”

And then grown-up Harry’s just like “I fucking knew it.”

Wait, Dumbledore came back in white robes for his appearance after his death…

OH MY GOD HE’S GANDALF.

ink-lights:

flower-whisper:

Black Gold Filled Fire Ruby For Sale! Surprise Your Special Someone With One of These!

***USE COUPON CODE: PRETTY FOR A DISCOUNT***

–> GET IT HERE <–

I WANT THIS

I NEED THIS SO I CAN BECOME THE EDGEQUEEN

metalbatteryzone:

metalbatteryzone:

I think my favorite things from Redbubble are the ones who just got stupidly lazy and just slaps an image on a t-shirt.

okay this is the best one

slimetony:

modestbee:

slimetony:

charmancler:

slimetony:

voidsenpai-desu:

slimetony:

It’s human nature to desire unrestricted access to mozzarella sticks

Randy your sticks

okay shut the fuck up

hey randy if you go to fridays you can get unlimited mozzarella sticks for $10

TGI Fridays can go to fucking hell for all I care

randy these people are trying to help you why are you pushing everyone away

Toxic masculinity and a deep rooted inferiority complex have led me to become a standoffish and aloof caricature of myself and I live in this hell every damn day