ilovesmoothjazz1998:

i love bread and i dont care what happens to me because of it

Bread makes you fat

Thank goodness for fandango

cabbagefuneral:

tumblr users: @staff give us replies back please we are dying

staff:  

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( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆

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fucktheflagandfuckyou:

lantilles:

meganphntmgrl:

Darth Vader believes in young girls, apparently.

Hell fucking yeah

Darth Vader is a feminist

Well yeah, he met his ex wife when she was taking a stance against droid armies and his daughter used military strategies to elude him for many years. Vader knows not to underestimate the power of women.

shiningshawol212:

just-shower-thoughts:

2000 mockingbirds = two kilamockingbird

Alcoholic mockingbird = tequilamockingbird

berningsensation:

When people try to tell me a $7.25/hour is a living wage

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When people try to tell me we can’t afford a single payer healthcare system

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When people try to tell me we don’t need police reform

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When people try to tell me green energy is economically infeasible

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When people try to tell me the government represents The People

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Zombie apocalypses are curiously lacking a large array of common equipment that could neatly control the situation.

rensbogusadventure:

govthookercoulson:

“But we can’t build walls to contain them!”

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Moves by truck, train or boat. Ridiculously common. And see those holes on the bottom? Mobile by forklift. Also, HEAVY, even when empty they’re in the tons. If you had some warning you could string these things end to end for miles and human bodies can’t move them. Plus they’re nice and wide so you can comfortably walk on top of them for patrols.

“But we don’t have easy ways to kill them!”

Put the shotgun down you fucking idiot.

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No tires to pop. Heavy and slow but inevitable. Climbing required to enter and thus, relatively zombie proof, especially if you spend like an hour to protect the glass.

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A lot of large farming equipment can destroy cars.

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Want to guess what it’d do to a decaying human body? It’s not pretty.

Now I know what you’re thinking. Merely flattening them with common construction equipment or farming gear isn’t enough.

How about a tree trimmer that can mulch a tree top to bottom in nothing flat?

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OM NOM NOM NOM.

“But we need ways to move a lot of people that zombies can’t stop!”

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BEEP BEEP MOTHERFUCKER. Deer don’t have a chance and neither does a zombie.

“But that’s not good enough!”

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NOW it’s time to call our friend the military because this ride stops for no one.

Do I need to keep going or is it clear the movies are bullshit yet? Seriously a dozen prepared people with heavy equipment licenses could clear an entire street of zombies AND powerwash it after.

Country folk can survive

gvnkin:

japan vines are next level

So according to the bible god is everywhere. So are he inside us aswell? Are we having sex with god all life long? beside if god is everywhere then he is inside a lot of people... Biggest gangbang ever.

mx-bones-deactivated20160831:

i thought I was the one who needed to go to bed

acesentialsketches:

quartz-poker:

jimsdeadbones:

hellsbells9:

jackie-chaos-bunny:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

thatmostlyzeldablog:

real-faker:

zooophagous:

crazycritterlife:

chokesngags:

nightsofnuru:

sizvideos:

Video

Note taken

Is that a fucking bear??? I never really believed bears could run fast. Jesus Christmas.

Holy shit, its like terminator bear

Fun fact, a sprinting bear can run as fast as a galloping horse. Now if they replaced all the horses in the Kentucky Derby with bears, things would get a lot more interesting.

image BEAR IS APPROACHING AT ALARMING SPEEDS

Bear?

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Thank you, Avatar fandom.

Post hijacked by Avatar fandom this made my day

@sparepence IT U

Per some Physiologists in Japan, the top human speed may be enough to outrun a bear, it’s just there’s a technique and specific training to optimize the twitch muscles involved and no one has figured that out yet. http://www.livescience.com/8039-humans-run-40-mph-theory.html

Vaguely unrelated note, the silly-looking ‘Naruto run’ is better for your feet and closer to the ideal run technique than standard running- the human foot is meant to hit the ground ball-first, not heel-first like you do when you are used to running with shoes on. If you hit the ground ball-first, ground contact time is minimized, increasing forward velocity.

So, basically… run like a digigrade?

HAHAHAHA I’VE BEEN DOING THAT FOR YEARS ALREADY!

I’m the next evolutionary step, y’all.