potato-chips-in-the-bath:

my housemate was joking about me having an affair with someone, but she got stuck on a gender-neutral word for mistress/master and said mattress

just-shower-thoughts:

Saying you handle transactions for a multi-billion dollar company is way better than saying you’re a cashier at McDonald’s

just-shower-thoughts:

Lets say we send humans to another solar system after discovering a new technology, but it takes 100 years. Then, 50 years later, Eearth finds an even newer technology to send them there in only 4 years. So when the first humans arrive, they see the planet is already habited by humans.

just-shower-thoughts:

When the Hulk gives up and reverts to Bruce Banner, he just rage quit.

allkindsoffuck:

deelekgolo:

I’m at Fry’s and I connected to as many Bluetooth sound systems as possible from my phone.

ultrafacts:

Here’s a video of it being played: [x]

(Fact Source) For more facts, follow Ultrafacts

just-shower-thoughts:

A boomerang warehouse hit with a tornado wouldn’t lose any boomerangs.

just-shower-thoughts:

Rockstar shouldnt ban GTA V players for using money hacks, because the game is entirely about gaining money unfairly.

just-shower-thoughts:

What if Cthulhu did rise and everyone is terrified and then he whoops like Zoidberg