dracini:

a-random-mod:

deviantartwhy:

kill me

dracini

People can make oc’s how they want
If someone made this and likes it then who’re you to judge?
Let people me happy man.

I was tagging you because it was a plant pony.

dapper-deoxys:

You can use me pal but the moment you play with my friends like they are dumb, brainless puppets you’ve crossed the line

deviantartwhy:

kill me

dracini

ojiisanholic:

facingthewaves:

“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.

A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.

I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,

“I am the manager.”

a thing for one of my favorite posts on this site

sammy-makes-moosetracks:

The climax of poetic literature.

foxintwilight:

fuckin’ Gravity Falls

artisticautistic:

coconuttygrey:

el-aatmik:

tastefullyoffensive:

(photo by MaggleCole)

HOW DO YOU FUCK UP THIS BAD

oh my god… What happened. Is that a pressure cooker? It sure looks like it from that lid in the ceiling.

I’ve never been more confused

If thats a pressure ooker that was left unattended the it would explain everything. Pressure cookers can explode with enough pressure. That’s what the bomb at the boston marathon was a few years back. A pressure cooker filled with nails.

blackbirdrose:

zerachin:

theongreyjoy:

that show you have every intention of watching and you are 100% confident that you’ll love but you refuse to watch right now because its not the right time.

#THE STARS ARE NOT IN POSITION TO WATCH THIS SHOW

watchoutfordinosaurs:

mumblytron:

“but sex is what makes us human!”

 

in 1916 a French officer in his twenties writes his

doctoral dissertation under

heavy mortar fire.

he sends it by mail, a page

at a time, to his wife.

a week before he’s to step up to the podium and

defend his work rather than hiscountry

he is killed in action.

even as the bullets rip

through him he still wishes he could have become a professor

in French literature and

the university awards him a posthumous Ph.D.

sex is

 

a woman breaks down in tears on the phone because

a week is not enough time to

get over a breakup.

her sister drives an hour across town,

comes up the front steps with

a gallon of ice cream and somebeer

and together they eat moose tracks and marathon

every

single

Godzilla movie

ever made.

 

sex is

she’s late for work but her car isn’t

starting and even through her coat and hat she’s cold.

she knows she can’t be late again because she’s missed

one time too many already because her

father’s nurse was sick with the flu and someone

needed to help him bathe.

the clock ticks past fifteen after and she hits

the wheel like it’s a heavy bag as though that will help

steps on the gas like the car will go

and wonders how she will pay rent

and how she will feed her father.

sex is

 

it takes three people to hold the predator down because

even with the cover over his head

a bleeding eye and shattered wing

he is trying to hurt them.

none of them have seen this bird before in their lives but

they bandage his wing and head and give him a painkiller and

put him in a warm place to sleep and heal because

it is right.

at first he is paralyzed and cannot

fly but soon he is taking steps

and then fluttering, and then soaring, and

six months later he is whole and healed and hunting.

once he is gone they never see him again

which means they’ve done their jobs right.

sex is

 

in 1969 a girl watches grey-and-white footage on her parents’ tinytelevision and

can’t quite believe that what she is seeing is not a movie set but

another planet.

the men on the screen look a little like

aliens with bulbous heads and no faces and fat

marshmallow arms

but they are still men.

her mother puffs on a cigarette behind her and declares that

this is progress

even if it was just a small step.

the girl grows up to be not an astronaut but a secretary

and her boss calls her ‘sweetheart’.

but sex is

 

a boy is taught that real men don’t cry so

he doesn’t.

when his best friend dies from a self-inflicted

gunshot wound, he locks himself

in the shower every day and sobs under scalding

water until it runs cold

so nobody will see him grieving

so nobody will see that tears are just love that

has no place left to go.

he learns to dull love rather than suppress its expression and

soon the owner of the liquor store knows him by name.

three DUIs, two evictions, and twelve steps later,

he is feeding people at a homeless shelter,

and telling them it’s all right to cry.

Sex is

 

the broken man tells the comedian

that he didn’t mean to step in front of the car but the rain

made it hard to see.

he seems okay but his leg

does not.

the comedian clutches a grubby receipt with the driver’s

plate number scrawled on the back

in pink pen, stands out in the rain so the broken man

can have his umbrella,

and gives him the comedy routine that ruined his career

so the man doesn’t think about the pain in his leg.

once he’s out of the hospital, the fixed man sends him a thank-you card

with kittens on it.

what makes us human

 

yawning is contagious,

and there is a species of bird whose young we call “pufflings”.

melodic collections of sound, spaced by silence,

can move us to tears.

the tallest building in the world is

two-thousand seven-hundred and seventeen feet tall.

in less than eighty years we went from our first powered flight

to touching the moon,

and in one-hundred from the first phone call

to instantaneous connection between thinking machines of our owncreation.

we make pies out of tree organs

and let cow’s milk ferment until it hardens and then

we put them together, because apple pie with cheddar cheese isdelicious.

what makes us human is

the earliestfossils of anatomically modern humans are

two-hundredthousand years old .

we have had pet dogs

for sixteen-thousand of those years, longer

than corn

or the wheel.

the steps we take are part of

one of the most energy-efficient gaits the

animal kingdom has ever seen.

we invented the concepts of love

and hate

and justice, and mercy

and we invented the language to convey them.

we sharpened rocks, then metal, to convince other people

who don’t hold the same idea of those things as we do

because we think

it’s right.

we are two hundred millennia of love and disappointment and

sorrow and innovation and

mercy and kindness and dreams

and failure

and recovery.

but sex is what makes us human.

Holy CRAP that’s a good poem

zelda-pairings:

chiikapea:

THIS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE GUYS.

IF YOU ARE A LEGAL ADULT

FUCKING V O T E.

TRUMP IS WINNING

THIS IS HONESTLY SCARY AS SHIT AT THIS MOMENT. IF HE FUCKING WINS, WHO KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO US POCS. STOP TAKING THIS AS A FUCKING JOKE.

HONESTLY, IM AFRAID FOR MY FUTURE BECAUSE WHAT IF HE FUCKING DOES BECOME PRESIDENT??? HE WILL MAKE IT HARD FOR US.

YOU GUYS REALLY DONT UNDERSTAND HOW FUCKING IMPORTANT THIS IS. YOU

C A N N O T

LET TRUMP FUCKING BECOME PRESIDENT. YOUR LETTING SOMEONE WHO CANT EVEN FUCKING TAKE CARE OF HIS OWN BUSINESSES AND WIGS GET INTO OFFICE.

I DONT CARE IF YOU ARE NOT INTO POLITICS. VOTE FOR BERNIE SANDERS.

I DONT CARE IF YOU ARE LAZY, DO IT ANYWAYS.

I DONT FUCKING CARE IF YOU ARE WHITE, BLACK OR ANY OTHER COLOR.

PROTECT YOURSELF FROM THIS FUCKING STUPID ASS RICH MAN.

PLEASE.

You guys honestly don’t realize how important this is. That stupid ass man is in the lead with votes. You CANNOT let him win. To the people that don’t care, you will most definitely care once he’s in fucking office ruining everything more. You don’t understand how important this is to me. You don’t understand how scary this is for p.o.c .

Non Americans, spread this like wild fire! We may not be able to vote, but we can sure as hell spread any and all info we can get our hands on. If Trump wins, America is fucking screwed. POC’s are screwed. Mexico and Canada are screwed (he plans to build walls to block us off from them. America is, at least, one of Canada’s biggest trade partners. Do you know how fucked we can be if connections are cut off?) Voting and politics is no fucking joke. Treat this with maturity and responsibility. Even if you never vote again, make this coming election count!!