whois-chihoko:

tohellwiththebeatles:

Me: *listening to Bohemian Rhapsody* “THUNDERBOLT AND LIGHTNING VERY VERY FRIGHTENING ME!!”

My earphones:

I heard this post exactly how it demonstrates

fuckyeahtxtposts:

i walk into the bank and up to the counter “yes what can i do for you” the lady asks. “motherlode” i reply and instantly i have $50,000 in my hand

bisexualnoodle5:

This fucking show and these fucking idiots I just love them so much

starlightandust-marejai:

Did you want the red cable or the blue cable?

It doesn’t matter! They’re the same!

BE PATIENT WITH HER OKAY SHES TRYING HER BEST

This was going to be just a sketch in a page, but @icefyrre and my best friend’s boyfriend convinced me that this was too good for that, so I made a full piece and I’m very fucking glad, thanks for talking me into this

[Reblogs are appreciated]

rasticore:

bogleech:

tilthat:

TIL that the divorce rate of marriages are no longer at 50%. Divorces surged in the 70s and 80s skewing the stat. Current divorce rates are around 15%.

via ift.tt

I like how the high divorce rate is one of the first things cited by religious conservatives as an example of society supposedly deteriorating and it was just their generation

turns out divorce rates go down if you aren’t marrying people you don’t like

siverfanweedo:

norbah:

falstaffing:

yall i just found the funniest thing on the harry potter wiki

There’s also the general problem with the idea of speaking Parseltongue.

Snakes are deaf.

maybe JK Rowling don’t know anything about snakes 

luthorchickv2:

greia:

it-is-a-mystery:

leupagus:

itsnotvinebutitsfine:

| That’s…. not how that works

This woman deserves an oscar

same energy

Transcript:

Person in scrubs: This was a conversation I had while working at a retail pharmacy.

Person in scrubs: Hi ma’am, how can I help you today?

Customer: [rude, sounding bored] I need to refill my birth control.

Scrubs: Sure, let me check on that. Hm, it looks like you’re a little early. Did the doctor change the way you’re taking it?

Customer: [snidely] No, he told me exactly how to take it and that’s exactly how I’m taking it.

Scrubs: Okay, why don’t you tell me how you’re taking it, and I’ll make sure we wrote the correct directions the first time.

Customer: [rudely] I take one every morning at 8 AM, and so does my boyfriend.

Scrubs: [long pause, blinking] What?

I am shrieking with laughter but only because if I don’t laugh I will burst into tears. 

uncommonbish:

ENOUGH!

srsfunny:

I’ve been here longer than you and I’ve never seen a ghost here

egophiliac:

egophiliac:

egophiliac:

in my head Jake Coolice looks like a grownup version of that kid from the Burger King Kids’ Club and you’ll never convince me otherwise.

the sequel

bonus:

the Amnesty finale drops in 12 hours, and the trilogy is at last complete.

give Jake the happy ending he deserves :(