Yes he got like that by being so hormonally addled that he tried to fight a tree. But try to tell me a forest god wouldn’t have big leafy antlers just like that if he were to take a physical form.
Extremely City white people are so fucking weird they see a pic of a deer and theyre like “its an Old God, tell me the wisdom of the trees Forest Lord … wow this is just like game of thrones” its a deer. Its a fucking stupid idiot animal it doesnt know shit
who says the old gods aren’t stupid animals who are so hormonally addled they’d try to fight a tree
Look, I’ve lived a good chunk of my childhood in a halfway abandoned mountain village in the middle of nowhere. Which meant wildlife galore whether you liked it or not.
And that meant sometimes we saw a deer in the middle of the road at midnight and the majestic motherfucker just stared us down until my mom shredded our tires to stop from hitting him. Once we stopped he did a little half-bow as if saying ‘You have not committed an act of godslayer this night. Your bloodline shall bear no curse of mine’, and walked away chill as you please.
The next day a neighbor told us a deer with fucking big antlers got tangled in his fence because it was trying to steal his grapes.
I went on a hike with another neighbor to collect yarrow for tea. A bear came out of the woods towards us, went on its hind legs and inquiringly roared. And he pushed me, tiny as I was back then, behind me out of sight and spread his jacket wide to make himself seem bigger than he already was. He let out a sound I had not known humans were capable of making. He and the bear looked at each other for a moment, and came to an understanding. The bear went down and walked away, respecting a powerful opponent protecting its young.
A week ago, there had been a bear that completely tore apart our trashcan and gorged itself on half-fermented apples we threw away. My cousin had to chase it away, drunk out of its tiny fucking mind, with an umbrella that made weird noises when opened. The bear ran for its life, crashed into our wall, fell on its ass, and scampered away.
I was playing on a swing once, all alone, and a fox came up to me, the most beautiful animal I had seen in my ten years of life. Thinking it wanted to pass, I stopped swinging and sat still not to spook it. But instead of passing, the fox circled the swing, found it wanting, and came to sit before me perfectly poised and looked me in the eye, and I could swear it wished to tell me something but I could not understand the language spoken before human time.
Then my mom came out of the nearby inn, shrieked at the fox and swung her purse to chase it away. The fox jumped, ran off and fell into a ditch, all notions of grace gone with the wind.
What I’m saying is: the old gods are absolutely idiot animals who embraced the life of constant sex and hedonism in return for losing their higher power. Whether or not they regret it, we’ll never know.
Who told the stories about the old gods to begin with? ‘Cause it wasn’t city folk! Hate to break it to ya. That shit was invented by people who saw these animals daily, who hunted, butchered, and ate them, used their skins and bones, chased them out of their gardens, and swore at them for trampling their flowers.
Now, when city folks ask when the deer turn into elk, or what kind of dog you breed with a wolf to get a coyote, THAT’S when you laugh at ‘em.
…. I am deeply baffled by “when do the deer grow up to become elk?” …just…. I cannot even.
undertale fans will say “ugh i love toby fox’s music so much i wish there was more that i could listen to 😔 oh well” and then never listen to penumbra phantasm, stress, moonsetter, or final spice
Firelord Zuko’s chapter in the history books would basically be just a list of all of the buckwild and illegal shit he got away with.
“Was banished at the age of thirteen for speaking out of turn and accidentally challenging his father to a duel.”
“At the age of thirteen, he somehow was able to access all of the Air Nomad temples; without sky bison and prior to the invention of the airship.”
“The Kiyoshi Warriors became the Firelord’s traditional bodyguards after meeting him as a prince in an encounter that led to him burning down their village.”
“He defeated Commander Zhao in an Agni Kai duel at the age of sixteen.”
“It is speculated that he is the Blue Spirit, a vigilante figure known for his agility. Both the Firelord and the Blue Spirit have been known to use Dao swords, a weapon that is very rare, which is why the connection is speculated. If this is true, then that means that the Firelord broke into Commander Zhao’s fort and stole the Avatar from him.”
“At sixteen, Firelord Zuko hired a bounty hunter to find the Avatar, which failed.”
“It is reported that the Firelord can hold his breath for up to 30 minutes after stories of him infiltrating the Northern Water Tribe through a turtleseal diving hole to steal the Avatar. After that, he proceeded to survive in the cold until rescued.”
“It is rumored that he worked in a tea shop in Ba Sing Se while living as a refugee in banishment. Tea shop-goers at Ba Sing ASR’s Jasmine Dragon often speak of a server named Lee, who bears a striking resemblance to the Firelord, but it is unclear whether the fabled Lee from the Tea Shop really exists.”
“According to the Firelord himself, he broke into Lake Laogai unnoticed and freed the Avatar’s pet bison.”
“He aided his sister in killing the Avatar in the crystal catacombs, whereupon he was allowed to return to the fire nation as crown prince.”
“Upon his return to the fire nation, he hired an assassin to kill the 12 year old Avatar whom he wasn’t sure had been actually killed.”
“On the Day of Black Sun, Zuko confronted Firelord Ozai with his swords. When Ozai shot lightning at Zuko, Zuko used lightning redirection (a technique invented by General Iroh) to fire it back at him. He then proceeded to leave the fire nation and join the Avatar, whom he had previously tried to murder.”
“After meeting the Avatar and his friends at the Western Air Temple, Zuko promptly gets rejected from their group. Only after defeating ‘Combustion Man’ (the assassin he sent) is he allowed to join them.”
“Firelord Zuko was among the first group in history to plan to and successfully escape the Boiling Rock Maximim Security Prison by starting a riot, kidnapping the warden, and getting on the gondola. Other escapees include Sokka of the Water Tribe, Hakoda of the Water Tribe, a Kyoshi Warrior named Suki, and Chit Sang.”
“After defeating his sister in an Agni Kai duel, Firelord Zuko ascended to the throne as the Avatar worked to defeat Firelord Ozai. Zuko is responsible for the imprisonment of his father and sister and the end of the 100 Year War.”
Bonus Headcanon;
“While previous Firelords had wished that their imperfections be left out of their royal portraits, Firelord Zuko specifically requested that the burn scar over his left eye be painted with him.”
rip to fire nation students majority of those events happened in less than a year
“hey isnt that sokka guy he lead a prison break with the one credited with the invention of airships?”
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
