i think it is good to warn people in advance about the circumstances that will cause you to bite them and i think that having given that warning it is good to follow through when the time comes
the rattlesnake is an admirable creature whose virtues we should emulate
One time at dance some rando grabbed me by the waist and told me to dance with him and I told him “if you don’t let go I’m going to bite you” and he didn’t let go so I bit him and that really should be the end of the story but he thought that was funny so I turned around and gave him a donkey kick to the shins and took about a 4 inch strip of skin with me so what I learned that day is when one is without debilitating venom, one must be as a horse do
“be as a horse do” is my new favorite colloquialism.
Be as the snake. He has the kindness to warn of the danger before striking.
Be as the horse. She knows her limits and bends to no one.
Booty shorts that say “essential npc” across the ass
This is weirdly encouraging because at some point in life you’ve gotta come to terms with the fact that you’re only a PC in your own story, you’re an NPC to everyone else on the planet.
But that doesn’t mean you have to be “only an NPC.” You can still be an essential and valuable part of other people’s stories.
The person who first discovered that coconut could be eaten must have experienced depths of hunger many will never know.
They prolly just saw some other animal doin it my man
you mean like the coconut crab, which naturally feeds on coconuts by breaking htem open with large claws?
Coconut crab: I sneep. I break ze coconut. I eat ze coconut.
Some dude:
K but have y’all seen what coconut crabs look like cause
Jesus Christ
For clarification, the crabs are not accused of killing Amelia Earhart. The idea is that if she died after crash landing on an island in the pacific the coconut crabs would have eaten her corpse and scattered the bones, which is why no one has ever found her body.
The true lesson of Homestuck is that if you want your alien OCs to become popular, provide one (1) suggestively bizarre detail about their reproductive biology and adamantly refuse to elaborate.
and the lord of the rings. tolkien invented whole languages and cultures and mythologies and histories, and the staggering enormity of the worldbuilding tolkein accomplished is only ever hinted at in the actual corpus of the lord of the rings, but he never wrote down the elf words for cock and balls
Amusingly, that’s only half right. While Tolkien never wrote down the elvish words for “testicles”, he did come up with elvish words for “penis”. The terms appear only in his early lexicons and are not repeated later, so they’re not guaranteed to be compatible with the versions of elvish that actually made it into the books, but the words do exist.
This actually brings up an interesting point. Humans only have testicles because our body temperature is too hot to allow sperm to live inside the body. So if elves have a lower body temperature, which it is slightly suggested as they don’t feel the cold the way men do, it’s entirely possible that elves, in fact, do not have testicles, cause they don’t need them.
Hey, we’re back on topic.
Legolas to gimli: what is that weird growth next to your gwib?
and then they hire you to work on the official comics and to animate the sonic mania opening AND to redesign sonic for the movie cause they messed up the first time
sega really saw this and was like PUT THIS MAN IN CHARGE OF SONIC
To be fair, that’s probably one of the more Tamer things that the Sonic fandom has drawn
So imagine you’re a gay top, right, and you’re out on a date with your partner, just having a fun time, and you’re about to head home, when you spot this kid passed out on the streets, your partner wants to help him, but you’re obviously a little worried that you could face severe repercussions if you help this random kid, then you realize that he could be a potential ally, so the two of you drag him out of the streets and into a safe space, and when he wakes up, he confesses that he’s homeless, so you and your partner go through the process of adopting him, you two take him home, you two give him a good meal, you two start to teach him some philosophies in life, he slowly grows up, you two help him through his bad dreams, you two help him through his bad memories, you two play games with him, he completely roasts you at an eating contest, he’s extremely active, you’re always on the move, you’re walking everywhere, like literally walking all the time, like so much walking, and you’re there for him and then all of a sudden, his childhood friend shows up on your doorstep and is like, “Your adopted son is really the king.” and then he falls in love with a woman in like 2.55 minutes which is definitely not something you two taught him how to do, so you’re confused, and the weather gets really weird, and you’re even more confused and in the end, all you really want to know is WHO’S THE MONKEY and by the time you’re dressing in drag and doing the hula, you’ve realized that maybe it’s better if you just don’t worry about it…
I am Silver Tongue, I am an artist. I have many characters and you can check out my art in the art tag. I occasionally practice witchcraft though I don't do anything too complicated. I am girl 2 and don't know what else to put here.
