post–grad:

• no fake friends, just real friends (the only ones who’ll come out to your godforsaken lighthouse to hang)
• lots of stairs so u dont need a gym membership
• when u look out the window and sigh mournfully it’s Cinematic Depression not just regular depression
• minimum requirements: 1 large dog, 17 cable-knit sweaters, 1 mysterious but tragic past, 2 pair fingerless wool gloves
• increased likelihood of mermaid encounters
  
• effortless windswept look, complemented by soft lantern glow
• free salt scrub 
  

toadprince:

toadprince:

toadprince:

if anyone is a trickster god, its todd howard. he has the reputation for being a liar. everyone knows he’s a liar. his whole job is pretty much just lying up on that stage. every single time he’s about to talk everyone starts talking about how much of a liar is. one of the biggest memes about his company is about how much he lies. and every single time, right when he hops up on that stage, everyone believes every single thing he says. 

todd howard’s dad is hermes or loki or something

gamer bros: ha Ha. don’t believe his Lies. Todd Coward.

todd: if you preorder Fallout: Skyrim Edition, you will receive a free girlfriend in the mail

gamer bros:

memecollegetwitter:

Originally posted by prettyokcowchopblog

When even Dr. Eggman is tired of Sonic’s Shit.

agent-fitz:

me for the thirty-seventh time this week: clean your room!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my executive dysfunction:

tolkienhoe:

femmefaramir:

penny-anna:

kayla-bird:

penny-anna:

penny-anna:

hot take: 

Gloin is the sexiest dwarf by dwarf standards.

Kili is the sexiest dwarf by elf standards.

Thorin is the sexiest dwarf by human standards

& Bombur is the sexiest dwarf by hobbit standards

#ITS TRUE AND YOU SHOULD SAY IT #(ALSO THORIN AND KILI BEING ‘UGLY’ BY DWARF STANDARDS IS AMUSING CONTENT)

further take: Kili is straight-up ugly by dwarf standards. Thorin is like, the dwarf equivalent of Benedict Cumberbatch. Some dwarves think he’s an absolutely dreamboat, others think he is super weird looking, there’s very little middle ground.

omg now i’m like. what does this make frodo by hobbit standards

by hobbit standards, I’m afraid Frodo is probably. not conventionally attractive at all.

Frodo is the sexiest hobbit by elf standards

@femmefaramir this is some fucking galaxy brain level tags and im crying out of sheer horror

glowy–sticks:

redprincessofdawn:

selenedrakant:

redprincessofdawn:

redprincessofdawn:

me: Princess Zelda’s a pretty cool character and is way more than just a damsel in distress.

some nerd: source????

me: 

me: ??????

me:

Didn’t do shit in Link’s awakening though

This post has over 50 thousand notes and this is the most baffling response to it I have ever seen. 

Yes, Zelda didn’t do anything in a game that she was not in. You fucking got me. In other news, Mario is a bad character because he didn’t do shit in Metroid Prime. 

Pikachu is a bad pokemon because he didn’t help sonic in sonic adventure 

I’d like you point out that Zelda DID do something in links awakening. She and impa gave him the boat

deusabinitio:

charlesoberonn:

At my funeral, I’m gonna hire somebody with a scar to look over my body and audibly whisper “I should’ve been the one to finally take you out.”

Alternatively, they could also whisper “They won’t get away with this. I’m gonna finish what you started, old friend.”

They’ll have instructions to read the room and choose which they deem best fit

theawesomeadventurer:

everyday-younglife:

shout out to the patient I called to remind to pick up their medication, whose voicemail message was “HEWWO? HEWWO?? WHO IS THIS??? WEAVE A MESSAGE” that rang out throughout the whole pharmacy, killing me instantly

the one time I’m like “this is the one time I dreamed blog” and it isn’t

halfjackets:

halfjackets:

for the honour of gayskull

my dudes it was a shit post it’s not supposed to get 10000 notes