maplebungus:

fuckdamn:

hozey-nevergoingtochurch:

maplebungus:

heartshapedbasil:

your man doesn’t have the mental strength to caramelize onions 

your man thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions

Who’s fucking carmelizing onions?

Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist?

do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions

this post is funnier with each passing day. the caramelized onions of posts

skateboarding-sankaku-pitcher:

The game: Yeah, let’s make them run through an alley and catch up to the thief in a way that seems possible and doesn’t ruin the pacing of the scene at the same time

The anime: And then they said ✨P A R K O U R✨

manhattan-gamestop:

manhattan-gamestop:

This video somehow pinpoints my exact sense of humor

I’m gonna scream

silver-tongues-blog:

sumetal:

centipede-damascus:

maydei:

This… is a Dad Meme.

This is the only good comment on this entire waste of a post

chefpyro:

officialfist:

chefpyro:

mohiko:

chefpyro:

mohiko:

chefpyro:

mohiko:

chefpyro:

Hypothesis: Everything can be linked to Metal Gear through three associations or less.

Oh yeah?! Test this!- Vladimir Putin.

Vladimir Putin is Russian.

Revolver Ocelot is Russian. Metal Gear Solid 3 takes place in Russia.

You can do better.

You’re right, that was weak- Assassin’s Creed.

Assassin’s Creed Brotherhood had a Raiden skin.

Well fuck- Legend of Zelda.

This one feels self-explanatory.

Donald trump

tim curry

probablybadrpgideas:

Have a scene were the forces of good are rallied by a big epic speech but done in the style of that one Superwholock “grab your wands!” tumblr post.

By far the most infuriating portion of my stream

61below:

justlookatthosesausages:

midnight–vamp:

I work in a kitchen. We are always told to not just stand around, that’s rule number one. Even if something’s on the stove, usually you can do something else while you wait for it.

EXCEPT

If it’s milk. “You stand right there and watch over it, do NOT leave.”

What’s even better is if you’re forced to leave because you need something from the fridge or something. So you dash into the back and get it and if someone wants to ask you something you just go “MILK! ON THE STOVE!” and everyone jumps out of your way and goes “oh shit, run!!!”

It’s the funniest thing I’ve ever encountered at work

In French we literally have an old saying, “I have milk on the fire” to say “I’m very busy at the moment” 

cardassiansunrise:

unmutekurloz:

phanstop:

wontforgets:

snowwanderer:

jeanqueerschtein:

kohai-san:

fuck-you-im-australian:

mr-egbutt:

residentevils:

when u accidently type me instead of my 

accidentally typing “yeha” instead of “yeah”

accidentally typing olay instead of okay

accidentally typing “oy” instead of yo

accidentally typing “god” instead of “good”

accidentally typing ‘thy’ instead of ‘they’

accidentally typing “beliebe” instead of “believe”

typing “hte” instead of “the” 

typing “laso” instead of “also”

typing “oaky” instead of “okay”