Silver Tongue

slime-chunks:

I LOVE YOU….

Icarly was fucking terrifying

fuckstaffposts:

thenixkat:

phony-time-traveler:

Sam knocked out a female heavy weight wrestler in one move, after directly asking her “Hey I’m pissed wanna throw down” and getting consent. She was 100% prepared for combat at that moment.

Freddy Hacked into a military computer, made a youtube video that could permanently damage your eyes, and also turned a toy gun into a functional laser gun.

Spencer had the gift of pyrokinesis which went off at random and this was treated as only a medium inconvenience.

Carly was able to manipulate all 3 of these people, one of them being her legal guardian. Sam and Freddy were said to be able to argue indefinitely, Sam even getting into a fight with her mom for so long the therapist who forced them into conversation nearly went insane.

Yet Carly could just say “Hey guys shut up” and they would stop talking right away.

Didn’t they have a rival who was pretty much just a straight up supervillain?

His name was Neville and he controlled the government

is anyone going to mention gibby?

varnishedtruths:

9d6problems:

endlessnightarts:

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BUT DOES RUNNING WATER KILL THEM OR NOT??!

Spoiler: running HOLY water sure as hell does.

This scene is a bunch of D&D players trying to figure out how somebody’s new ability works after they all leveled up. Dracula is the DM.

dr–wizard:

dr–wizard:

There is nothing that embodies all my favorite things in a character design more than

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I look at this guy and go “well he’s just going to cast spells huh”

@chefpyro

jinkies-binx:

jinkies-binx:

jinkies-binx:

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i ran in front of the train with my horse for fun and now it’s in harveys house with me this is the best day ever

WAIT

theres a

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Horse

LOOSE

IN THE HOSPITAL

c-jay321:

shinelikethunder:

fahre:

sophus-b:

hjbender:

raeseddon:

nerdgasrnz:

spacemancharisma:

vorpalgirl:

uozlulu:

princessparadoxical:

isakisol:

Hey fun fact, if you write fuck in the tags your post wont show up in any tag, so uuuuuh heads up

Also fun fact, adding “porn” in your reblog tags (e.g. “history porn” or “fashion porn”) means that those posts won’t show up when you search your own blog.

Wank too. It’s why I changed all my fandom #wank posts to fandom #dramaz posts

….well this is a psa that needs to go around

I tagged one of my drawings as “well mark me down as both scared and horny” and it vanished from the other tags until I removed that so… “horny” too, apparently

One of my comics wasn’t showing up in tumblr tags until I removed all my tags with the crass language in it. (”shitposting” and “bitch” were the 2 I suspected) Then it conveniently started appearing publicly in the tags.

Oh my god this site really did become catholic

The following tags are (also) no longer searchable:

erotic
orgasm
bdsm
sexual*
vagina
breasts
foreskin
suicide
semen
ejaculation
foreplay
masturbation

*Note: this includes combined search terms such as “sexual health”, “sexual help”, “sexual orientation”, etc. 

Tags that are still searchable:

white pride
white power
whites only
aryan
volkisch
n*gger
ch*nk
and probably every racial slur you can think of, I was too nauseated to look anymore

Speaking of the aforementioned censored tags:

  • sexual is censored but sex isn’t
  • vagina is censored but penis isn’t
  • wank is censored but wanker and bugger aren’t

And here’s some additional tags that seem to have been screened:

  • lolita is censored, because screw you if you want to talk about literature or Japanese fashion
  • sexing is censored; animal husbandry is risque now
  • gore, including cw gore, because content warnings are forbidden
  • pedophile but not pedophilia for some reason; heads up for content warnings there, too
  • ass… and butt as well, because even if you have to be 13 to get an account on this site, the censorship is apparently operating at elementary school level
  • bondage, because you are not allowed to quote Harriet Tubman, Abraham Lincoln, or Nelson Mandela in the tags now
  • threesome is censored, but thankfully triad and OT3 aren’t (yet)
  • oral is censored, including compounds such as oral contraceptive, oral defense, and oral tradition
  • sadism is censored, (masochism isn’t)
  • labia, vulva, clit, and clitoris are all censored, but testicles, gonads, ballscojones, and bollocks aren’t
  • cunt and pussy are censored too, but again, not penis
  • cock is though; you can’t “cock an eyebrow” or “hear the cock crow” in the tags
  • dick, including names such as, for example, Dick Cheney

First rule of Club Penguin: Nobody talks about Club Penguin.

Goddammit, Tumblr, my pre-17th Scunthorpe Problem shitposting was meant to be an entertaining diversion from the imminent apocalypse, not a prophecy.

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thats-so-college-chick:

millennial-review:

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$1 in 1922 USD is equivalent to about $14.95 today for anyone wondering.

shiromomo:

the-great-snape-debate:

So me my mom and my moms cousin went out for dinner and were eating and there’s a family in the booth next to us and they’re talking about how his family came from Germany and he mentioned his father came from some small town in Germany (said the name I don’t remember what it was) but it was one of those small towns where everyone knows everyone it’s super tiny.

So my moms cousin goes “I’m sorry I don’t mean to eavesdrop but my family is from there.” And this guy looked so excited and they start chatting for a bit and the guy goes “What was your family name?” And she goes “Zimmerman.” And the guy gets suuuuuper quiet and goes “…… oh.” Like flat tone nothing.

She goes “What’s yours?” And he quietly tells her but won’t look at her and she goes quiet and goes “Oh.” And goes back to her food and the tables got SUPER awkward and tense and I’m sitting there going “Wtf is going on?” Cause they both suddenly stopped talking to each other.

On the way out I’m “What was that about?” She goes “I’ll tell you in the car.” So we get in the car and I’m like “Okay wtf was all that about?”

She goes “My great grandfather assassinated his grandfather.”

I’m like O_O ……….

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